Self Care

  • 74: Show up for yourself

    Podcast: Play in new window | Download

    Subscribe: Apple Podcasts | Spotify | RSS

    In this empowering episode, we delve into the art of showing up for yourself every single day and why it is so important. Discover practical strategies and mindset shifts that will help you cultivate a strong sense of self-advocacy and resilience. It’s time to step into your power and strengthen your self love and self care through showing up for yourself.

    Resources from today's episode

    Work with Phi

    The inspiration behind showing up for yourself

    Hello beautiful soul,

    This episode is inspired by a post I shared on Instagram this week about showing up: Show up when things get difficult. When things get out of hand. When things feel dark. Show up, not for the world. Show up, not for anybody else. Show up for you, in whatever way you need to. It’s not about being perfect, it’s about honouring your heart and soul. Be kind to yourself. Be loving in the way that you need. Take care of yourself and watch as you bloom, watch as life and the universe show up for you too.

    The message of showing up really came through as a strong clear message as I channeled earlier this week because collectively it’s been energetically dense lately, there’s been a lot of with eclipse energy, Scorpio full moon and Mercury retrograde. It can feel heavy and so I wanted to share something practical that anyone can do, right now, no matter what is going in your life and that is: showing up. 

    Before I begin, I wanted to show up for you listening to let you know I am here if you need support and guidance. I have availability for 1:1 coaching as well as human design readings so if you’ve been thinking about it or feeling the pull, this is your sign to get in touch and let’s chat to figure out how I can best help you with everything going on in your life and within yourself right now. 

    What does showing up for yourself mean?

    Showing up is so personal to everyone, it changes and is subject to different circumstances yet ultimately showing up is honouring yourself, making yourself a priority and taking care of yourself. Showing up is to live intentionally and to be an active participant inside of your own life daily.

    You can thinking of showing up as being the captain of your own ship, navigating the waters of life. Showing up for yourself means taking control of the helm, by making intentional choices, and steering your life in the direction you want to go. Now do note, just because you’re in charge doesn’t mean you have full control: there are still circumstances you can’t such as the wind direction, temperature and the sea in which you are in. So as captain you have to stay attentive and mindful of the changing currents and conditions. Showing up requires your conscious awareness, adaptability and resilience in the face of the dynamic nature of life and potential challenges. 

    Showing up for others is easier

    In most cases and this may apply to you, it’s much easier to show up for someone or something else. Showing up at work out of a sense of duty, obligation and work ethic. Showing up for a family member or friend because you really love them and want to help. 

    What about yourself? Who is showing up for you? Are you showing up for yourself? If you get on that spiral of but if I choose myself first how can I show for others well it’s a win win because when you show up for yourself first, your capacity and bandwidth expand so that you can show up for others. It’s not about being selfish or not wanting to help others, it’s about making sure you’re also taking care and loving yourself to as the beautiful, kind, generous and loving soul that you are.

    Showing up in contrast to self abandonment

    You may be unconscious that showing up for others is a habit giving away as opposed to conscious and intentional decision. On Autopilot. When it comes to personal development and growth, abandonment often surfaces in relation to others but a blindspot I’ve noticed working with clients is what can happen is you may unintentionally abandon yourself automatically putting others needs and wants first, without consideration of your own.

    This quote by Howard Thurman summarises it nicely: “Don’t ask what the world needs. Ask what makes you come alive and go do it, because what the world needs is people who have come alive.”

    Real life examples of showing up

    An example of how I have been showing up for myself daily is going for walks after eating, it helps me to step away from the laptop (as most of my work is done there) as well as helps with digestion. Creatively showing up for myself has been writing more and committing to writing everyday! Writing my book The Great Unlearning was a huge journey, it’s over 110,000 words and it was released almost a year ago. Recently my creative juices has been flowing from just starting to write for fun and then writing to share on my Instagram and share messages I think that will help the community.

    Working with clients, I’ve seen one client who has previously had limiting self beliefs around being creative, show up for herself by realising creativity doesn’t need to be art as an example and in turn she’s creatively reworked her resume for a new industry as she seeks to change careers.

    For several clients, showing up has meant returning home to visit family and friends (expats who have moved overseas) as their most authentic selves. There can be a fear of fully shining and making others feel perhaps their lives aren’t as exciting or they haven’t had as much growth but for these clients showing up for themselves means honouring their full experience, the challenges yes but also the highs and the wins unapologetically. 

    For other clients, showing up has meant confronting and facing past memories that have been painful in order to feel them and move forward whether that be grieving a breakup or death of a loved one. For another client showing up always happened for her work but not herself, and so showing up this month meant setting time aside for herself to plan and reflect things for her on a personal level.

    Showing up is important

    Showing up is committing to yourself now in the present moment as well as committing to your future. Showing up is important because you are important and you matter. Showing up creates momentum. When you show up regularly for yourself whether it’s practicing a new skill or pursuing a passion, you create a momentum that propels you forward. This momentum makes it easier to stay motivated and inspired, leading to greater progress and achievement over time.

    Now remember showing up isn’t always striving forwards in terms of your actions, for example at times showing up for yourself requires honouring the need to rest and slow down. Whilst you may perceive this to be a backwards step or failing to show up, ultimately you are. Taking care of yourself prevents further pain, stress and burnout so essentially you slow down, in order to speed up.

    Showing up: Accountability and resilience

    Showing up also cultivates accountability to yourself (your integrity: your commitment to yourself) as well as resilience. We can show up for ourselves no matter what, because showing up is unique to that day and moment. 

    You are facing the world in whatever way you need to instead of hiding away and leaking your power. Setbacks may and lets be real will happen but when you continually show up, it doesn’t feel like it chips away because you know that no matter what happens you will honour yourself and that attitude in itself allows you to bounce back quicker, one of my favourite Chinese proverbs “fall down seven times, get back up eight,”

    Showing up is stepping into your power and strengthens your self esteem

    Showing up leads to a fulfilling life because you are an active participant. You’re not just at the mercy of the universe and circumstances. You aren’t a victim. You are choosing to do what you can. You are choosing the mindset of being empowered. This ties in with episode 70 where I spoke about the butterfly effect. Showing up can feel small and you can question it’s significance but as we know with the butterfly effect it creates ripples and greater impact and influence beyond what you can perceive in the moment. 

    Ultimately what matters is showing up influences what is important: what you think of yourself. Being proactive and actually caring. When you are someone who shows up for themselves no matter what, that’s going to cultivate self love, self care and self commitment. 

    To show up is to be present

    Showing up for yourself starts by being in the present moment and acknowledging your present state internally. Be in the state of observation and noticing. Take the framework of checking in with mind, body and soul. Can you pause, lay down judgement and allow it?

    How are you feeling? What is going on in your life? What is the state of your physicality? How are you mentally? How does your soul feel? How does your heart? 

    To show up is to be self aware

    Check in with yourself to see what you need and desire for yourself based on your assessment. This is going to change one day showing up might mean taking a break for yourself where as another time is may require discipline such as setting time aside to exercise because your health is one of your biggest priorities right now. When life feels draining and happiness is dry, showing up may mean doing something fun and pleasurable. 

    Show up for yourself by doing what you need to do to get into full alignment before taking on the demands of the world and other people’s energy. Know that when you are being your most authentic and aligned self, that everyone gets to this best version of you too.

    Some form of journaling is a beautiful practice because being able to get your thoughts out from your head onto paper, can help in expressing yourself leading to self validation as well as the opportunity to understand yourself better for example you may see thought patterns emerging or consistent emotions arising to the surface to reveal something.

    Showing up is a commitment

    Showing up for yourself means being all in on you. Understanding that you are priority, in fact the #1 priority. Self-commitment that lays the foundation for personal growth, fulfillment, and well-being. The one person that is there from the moment you are born until the moment you pass, will only be and always you. You are important, have your own back!

    When you consistently show up for yourself and your vision, you demonstrate a commitment to your personal growth and development. You embody what it means to love yourself, to take care of yourself and step in to your power. 

    Think of this scenario, your dream is to become a pro footballer. Do you show up only when you’re winning in matches and feeling good? Do you show up even when there’s setbacks like not making the cut for the next level team? In winter, if you are healthy and well, do you continue to practice even though it’s cold and miserable outside? 

    A quote attributed to Tanner Christensen states: “Even on the days you don’t feel like it, showing up can make all the difference. If you show up and start the work – even though it feels so heavy to do so – what you end up making could be all you need to keep moving, to keep creating.”

    To back yourself is to show up

    Showing up is knowing what you want and allowing yourself to be in positions, opportunities and environments to make that happen. For example if showing up for yourself means advancing your career, it’s about honouring what is in your control to make that happen such as you having a discussion with your boss about opportunities to progress in your company or proactively asking for more training and development. It may involve uncomfortable scary conversations like asking for a pay raise in honour of you recognising how much work you do and your needs for more money (such as to save for something you really want like a house, car or course). It could mean stepping into leadership positions and putting your hand up for projects you desire.

    You could have the best idea in the world but it’s nothing if you don’t show up for it and make it an actual reality. 

    Showing up is be to an advocate for yourself

    This threads through with my next point on how to back yourself which is to advocate for yourself. To speak up for yourself. Often we don’t out of perhaps fear, confrontation, being too loud or annoying or even thinking that it’s silly to. 

    How you feel is never wrong because how you feel is always valid (that’s a podcast episode for the future) but can you adopt the perspective that a feeling is neither “right” nor “wrong” but simply is? What we do with how feel is up to us and that can lead to decisions and choices that we fully own whatever the outcome is. 

    How to advocate for yourself again changes based on the circumstances and context for example it may be inappropriate to blow up at someone for something going wrong in the workplace, but it it may be appropriate to have a private conversation afterwards once you’ve cooled down. 

    I’ve led the discussion on how to show up for yourself in terms of practical actions and I also wanted to share 3 key mindset perspective shifts that are also important. 

    Showing up isn’t about perfection it’s an energy and attitude

    It’s saying, I’m here. To wrap your head around this one, an example is in relation to other people. Say you have an important event coming up, you’ve been working on this project for years and the big moment is here. Imagine someone you loved didn’t show up because they were worried about how they looked. Ultimately you don’t care because it’s more important the fact that they showed up, even if they were late, even if they could only be there for five minutes. 

    What about when you’re feeling down and someone reaches out to you. They are currently overseas so they can’t be with you physically but they want to show up virtually through an online meeting or call. Imagine they didn’t do it in the first place because they couldn’t do it in person and thought why bother?

    It’s that feeling as a kid, doing a school play and looking out into the audience with the confidence of hey my parents are going to be there no matter what. That security. That comfort. That reliability. Whether your parents could or did is another matter but ultimately you can give that to yourself right here and now, for the rest of your life, showing up as that for you. Being the parent or partner or friend you always wanted or needed. You are capable of doing that.

    You never know where showing up will take you

    You’re wildly passionate about yoga and so you’ve taken teacher training and you’ve now you’re ready to share the power and magic of yoga with the world. You’re nervous about putting on a paid class for the first time. Will anyone come? What if no one does?

    Show up. Even if no one is there, you get to embody your practice and new found skills. How deeply do you care and love yourself to do that? Plus if no one else shows up how would anyone else actually know but you. Whilst many feelings may arise to the surface, they can be great teachers. Feeling rejected yet showing up despite no one coming, you didn’t reject yourself. Feeling not good enough, taking a moment to assess the circumstances: did people know about your class, what was the pricing in relation to the industry, did you try different avenues to get people to come to the class? 

    Let’s say you show up but you feel disheartened because there’s only one person there. You could change that one person’s day or even life. They showed up because they are struggling but your class came at the right time happened to be intimate and private to help them through a season of difficulty and darkness in their life. You became the light because you showed up. You focused on your mission: to share the magic and power of yoga, you delivered! Perhaps a few weeks later, this person reaches back out because they happen to work in the HR department of a massive tech company and would love to pay you to run weekly yoga sessions in their office.

    You’re listening to me on my podcast because of this very sentiment and the journey on how I became a life coach. I showed up online consistently everyday posting even when I had 0 followers, likes and comments. I showed up anonymously at first because the fear of people I knew in real life seeing what I was doing scared me. I was scared to be seen. Posting about my passion of mental health. Fear of judgement. I didn’t let that be an excuse so I found a solution to be anonymous. I showed up even though I didn’t started trained as life coach, I showed up because of my passion and genuine desire to help people. All of this led to where I am now, in my third year full time in my own business doing what I love. My soul is fulfilled. My soul is free. My soul is abundant.

    Showing up is a significant step towards success, if not really success in itself

    What comes to mind is the 2002 Winter Olympics in Salt Lake City. Steven Bradbury, an Australian athlete was competing in short track speed skating which is chaotic in itself, people are jostling and bumping into each other, they are required to wear helmets.

    Steven Bradbury getting into the final was an amazing feat itself given he was an underdog, the official Olympics website even states “he had never excelled at any major competition, other than in relay events, prior to the Salt Lake City Games. Before 2002, the Australian’s highest finish in an individual Olympic competition was the eighth place he achieved in the 500m race in 1994.” In the lead up to the Olympics, Bradbury faced multiple setbacks in his journey including a thigh injury where he lost litres of blood, required 111 stitches (cheeky angel number wink there hey) and took 18 months to fully recover. 

    His journey to the finals were no easy feat, in the quarter finals everything was against him, the favourites to win and he did not technically finish in the top two to advance however he ending up doing so as another racer was disqualified. Ultimately in the final, after consulting with his coach the strategy was to stay back as he acknowledged he could not match the pace of the top competitors. What ended up happening was a huge collision taking out the majority of the race except Bradbury skating on through to win the gold medal, coming first and securing his place in history as the first Australian to win a Winter Olympics gold medal.

    On the decision to accept the gold medal, Bradbury said I’ll accept this gold medal. But not for the 90 seconds of the race – I’m going to take it for the 14 years of hard work.” Bradbury’s win resonates with the importance of showing up (as well as luck and strategy). The other competitors may have been faster, more athletic but ultimately it didn’t matter in the end for that particular race. Bradbury’s win serves as a reminder that perseverance and dedication are important and often rewarded (though it may take time!).

    Showing up beyond traditional success

    In essence, Stephen Bradbury’s gold medal win is more than just a sporting achievement; it’s an inspiring embodiment to the power of showing up, persevering in the face of adversity, defying the odds and seizing opportunities when they arise. All of which stemmed from showing up and not discounting himself out of the race beforehand.

    A beautiful insight I wanted to share by Robert Holden is “To be successful in life, work, and relationships, you have to do one thing first—you have to show up. In other words, you have to be willing to show the world who you are and what you believe in. And you have to keep showing up in spite of the setbacks and the heartbreaks. The temptation to edit yourself and to hide will only leave you feeling dead inside. Yet the more authentic you are, the more true success you will enjoy and the more alive you will feel.”

    You can't afford to not show up for yourself

    His insight came about from the Zulu people of South Africa, how they powerfully greet people in two parts: one part says: “I am here to be seen” and the other part is “I see you.”

    Ultimately bringing this episode on showing up to an end, perhaps it’s the perspective that you can’t afford not to show up, because showing up represents so much with many benefits as I’ve shared throughout this episode. To not show up is to deny your value and existence. As Tanner Christensen puts it “Your brush or pen strokes are uniquely yours, nobody else can make them for you. The same goes for the words you write, the songs you sing, the pictures you take, the moves you dance, or the floor plans you draw-up. Your ideas and the way you execute them are strictly your own. They are a great part of the value you provide. To not show up is to deny your work and your ideas existence. So we have to show up, whenever physically able. At least for a moment, for a few key presses or a few flicks of the brush.”

    To end this episode, what is one actionable thing you can do right now to show up for yourself?

    I’ll leave you on that question beautiful soul and know that showing up for yourself may also mean getting, receiving and having support. We all need support in life, it isn’t something we are meant to do alone nor is it enjoyable, it can be a lonely and difficult journey.

    Should you want or need support, guidance in your life whether it be showing up for yourself, your dreams, desires, career, relationships, happiness, abundance — I’m here for you! I’ve got your back as someone to speak to and bounce thoughts and ideas with. 

    I offer 1:1 coaching session and human design readings to help you. More information available on my website phidang.com or my Instagram @thephidang, please reach out I would love to hear from you. Until next time beautiful soul, love and positivity. 

    Let’s work together through 1:1 coaching and/or a human design reading. 

    Click here to read more

  • Life is tough, but so are you

    Life is tough, but...

    🧠 I keep messing up

    🧠 I feel defeated

    🧠 I won’t make it

    🧠 What’s the point

    🫀 Keep going

    🫀 Better days are coming

    🫀 Life is tough but so are you.

    What no one is talking about...

    It’s easy to get caught up in the belief that life seems easy and effortless all the time for everyone except you, that there must be something wrong with you because you are struggling and haven’t achieved the same amount as that person or done a lot like the other.

    The truth is life is hard inherently, life isn’t meant for your happiness, or at least just that… 💣

    Life is orchestrated for your growth and expansion 💥

    There will be tough times but if you’re honest, in those moments don’t you seem to change the most?

    The uncomfortable, the hard and discomfort help you to grow (it doesn’t feel like it at the time and often does looking back).

    Life is tough, but so are you 👊🏽

    I wrote the following in my book 📖 The Great Unlearning;

    “I know some days turn into nights and everything seems so unbearable you want to escape into darkness. When everything is dark, don’t forget about the light. Turn within and whisper to your soul. Place your hand over your heart and feel the devotion that beats for you. Some of the best days of your life are yet to happen. Some of the best moments of your life are yet to be had. Some of the unforgettable memories are yet to be made. The people you’ll meet are yet to be met. The souls you’ll fall in love with are yet to be loved. The excitement you’ll have that’s yet to unfold. The mystery and magic of life that’s waiting to reveal itself. Hold on because you’re only on a single page while novels are being written within you.” 🪄

    This is your sign to keep going, tough times aren’t the end, maybe they are a beautiful new beginning…

    Click here to read more

  • 43: Ell and Courtney – Thoughts That Manifest Podcast

    Podcast: Play in new window | Download

    Subscribe: Apple Podcasts | Spotify | RSS

    This episode features Ell Duclos and Courtney from the Thoughts That Manifest Podcast. We chat all things about friendship, family, abandonment wounds, loss and grief, self care and astrology + so much more. Ell is a Manifestation and Mindset coach and Courtney works in Critical Care. A powerful episode on all things deep, dark and beautiful in life.

    Featured Resources on the episode

    Chatting to Ell Duclos and Courtney from the Thoughts That Manifest Podcast

    Hello Beautiful Souls, today I am so excited to have Ell and Courtney from the Thoughts That Manifest Podcast which is all about inspiring people to awaken their mind to their limitless potential. I was recently on their podcast a couple of weeks ago and I’ll link it to you in the show notes it was such a beautiful deep conversation on uncovering your soul purpose through human design. We also discussed all things related to self love, self care and soul alignment!

    Ell Duclos and Courtney Human Design

    • Ell – Manifesting Generator 5/1 
    • Courtney – Emotional Projector – 4/6 

    What's covered speaking to Ell and Courtney from the Thoughts That Manifest Podcast

    • Describing each other, Ell and Courtney’s friendship of over 20 years!
    • Having other friends 
    • Long distance friendships and navigating that
    • Looking at their charts together I found it interesting that their energies overlaid to become one channel that’s activated is struggle – Ell has the energy of fear of purpose in the sense not living up to your full potential or that life is meaningless, Courtney has the energy of the fighter. 
    • Abandonment Wounds
    • Feeling and being alone
    • Loss and Grief
    • Being Parentless
    • Drugs and Addiction
    • Book Recommendations: Mother Hunger
    • Trigger Warning: Suicide, Death
    • Feeling like a saviour matyr
    • The channel of Judgement in Human Design
    • Emotions such as anger 
    • Inner Child Work
    • Running your own business
    • Manifesting
    • Astrology
    • What the houses mean in Astrology and a quick, simple and easy to understand overview
    • New Moon June 2023 Gemini 
    • Self Care
    • Unlearning 

    Click here to read more

  • 39: Divine Feminine Day Retreat and Scorpio Full Moon in May 2023

    Podcast: Play in new window | Download

    Subscribe: Apple Podcasts | Spotify | RSS

    This Saturday May 6th, I will be holding an in person Divine Feminine Day Retreat in Newtown, Sydney, Australia with my beautiful friend energy healer, yoga & meditation teacher Japna Singh Dussol. It happens to align and coincide with the Scorpio Full Moon Lunar Eclipse (unplanned but so divine!) This episode provides more information about the event and the energies at play at the moment (tiring and emotional!).

    Featured Resources on the episode

    The Divine Feminine Day Retreat Series - Autumn May 6th 2023: Newtown, Sydney, Australia

    Magic happens when women gather in circle.

     

    Honour your heart and soul with a nourishing day retreat with like minded women to rest and recalibrate with the changing of the seasons.

    With the end of summer, the days are getting cooler, the nights are getting longer and we are being called to journey within.

    To align with the rhythm and cycles of nature, the winds of change are here.

    Autumn is upon us, as we prepare for a period of rest with Winter. We are invited to slow down and surrender.

    To reflect and find balance: masculine and feminine, light and dark, past and future.

    To land here in the present and be grounded after the intense energies to kickstart 2023.

    Unwind, relax and release as we dedicate a day to self care. To let go of what no longer serves you, like the falling of leaves, bringing balance back into your mind, body and soul. To be held and supported in safe, sacred space and shift into a new energetic season.

    Your day retreat will include:

    – share circle and seasonal masterclass (letting go and surrender)

    – gentle yoga and meditation

    – sound energy healing

    – yoni steaming circle and sacred ceremony

    – connection to Mother Earth

    – journal prompts

    – morning tea and lunch

    Other details:

    When: Saturday 6th May 2023

    Where: 11-13 Darley Street, Newtown, Sydney

    Investment: $250 AUD

    We look forward to holding space for you! If you have any questions, reach out to either of us:

    Instagram: @thephidang or @japnasinghdussol

    Email: [email protected] or [email protected]

    Buy tickets by clicking here.

    Scorpio Full Moon Lunar Eclipse Energy Update

    We’ve had the new moon solar eclipse in Aries last week and now we are heading into a lunar eclipse full moon with Scorpio (which happens to be my sign!).  This eclipse is linked to the previous one because it’s the perfect time to let go of anything that arose back then and is part of a long series of Taurus and Scorpio eclipses, in fact the second last marker in this journey that began in November 2021 and will end in October this year around my birthday too, so I’m all too well of the feelings and energies of this one. 

    Take a moment to reflect on what was unfolding in your life since and back in November 2021 to zoom out and shed light on the storyline that is being divinely created and orchestrated in your life for your highest growth and expansion. 

    Scorpio represents the south node which is karmic and the past therefore it can particularly stir up karmic relationships and situations, residuals that may have previously begun with the solar eclipse last week to fall away because it no longer serves you. Think of it as a spiritual karmic detox and purge. I’m personally really getting the download for anyone listening here to pay attention to karmic relationships whether that be romantic, family, colleagues or friends. 

    The solar eclipse is about new energy and beginnings whereas a lunar eclipses is about completion or moving into a new direction. The moon represents the subconscious and feminine, so one can expect this full moon eclipse to be emotionally charged in some way. Eclipses often reveal things and with Mercury Retrograde about, as well as another retrograde in Pluto, expect the unexpected. Expect wildcards and curveballs thrown at you. Who knows what information could arise to the surface that could catch you off guard or perhaps even shocked. This is to say, it’s not all negative! It could be life altering, positive news too. 

    It’s the perfect storm one could say because Pluto actually rules Scorpio, alongside co-ruler Mars. To dive deeper into the influence of Pluto think back to around the 22nd/23rd of March when Pluto moved into Aquarius for the first time in our lives! Pluto energy is very aligned with Scorpio so the usual suspect themes: destruction, death, rebirth, the subconscious and transformation. With it moving into Aquarius it also brings about the themes of change, innovation, freedom, liberation, equality and the collective.

    Both planes aren’t known for being shy, if anything they are bold and out there so expect the revelations, energy and feelings accompanying the moon to be the same. The major theme I see arising from this transit is it’s asking for us to let go and master the art of emotional alchemy. Again if your feelings and energies are all over the place, a full moon has a strong influence alone let alone a lunar eclipse which is the energetic equivalent of 10 full moons at once so yes your feelings may be magnified, your feelings may be intensified and it can be temporarily destabilising.  

    To tune into our emotions and intuition. To face our emotions and feel them instead of running away, repressing, ignoring and blocking as we’ve been conditioned to. To transform our pain into power, wounds into wisdom and grief into gold (yep took that line straight of my book the Great Unlearning). Our feelings aren’t to be feared, they can be incredible portals of transformation and springboards for creativity. 

    Click here to read more

  • The past will take you hostage

    The past...

    If you’re not careful, the past will take you hostage.

    You’ll carry it like a momento in your wallet and it will weigh you down.

    You’ll watch as everyone else seems to have moved on except you.

    You’ll torture yourself in the ‘what ifs‘, ‘could have beens‘ and ‘if onlys‘.

    You’ll chase the feelings of the past.

    You’ll try to recreate it here and now.

    You aren’t who you used to be, you’ve inevitably changed.

    You don’t have to be who you used to be.

    Know that you cannot hold onto the memories, they will fade.

    Life goes quickly and we cannot waste it reminiscing on what was.

    You can't change what has already happened...

    If you’re struggling with the past, you’re struggling with your mind because it’s clinging onto memories and wondering what they mean.

    The last is dead and gone but you’re desperately trying to resuscitate it.

    Without your mind, the past simply wouldn’t exist.
    such a “past”.

    You can’t change what has already happened anyway.

    Yet the unconscious mind loves to fixate on it.

    As if worrying, obsessing, replaying will change anything…

    The unconscious mind becomes deeply intertwined with the stories – fixated, attached, longing for what has been.

    The past cannot be behind you if it is present.

    The path out of the past is built upon the foundations of consciousness.

    Awaking the inherent power that lies within everyone already — awareness and presence.

    Melting the resistance to this moment: the only true moment here in the now.

    The unconscious mind does not exist in the light of consciousness in the present moment because it cannot hide or pretend to be the past (or even future).

    You aren’t your past, you are the power and presence of consciousness.

    An excerpt from my debut book “The Great Unlearning — Awakening to Living An Aligned and Authentic Life”

    Currently available for preorder in Australia via Booktopia or Amazon (link in bio), International preorders opening soon via Amazon and Book Depository. Releases worldwide June 23rd 2023.

    love & positivity ✨ phi

    Click here to read more

  • Road to healing

    You can begin at any time...

    In the road to healing no step is too small or insignificant.

    All your steps count, even the baby ones.

    The days you wish had never happened will start to make sense, as painful and arduous as they were.

    Life doesn’t spare anyone from the baptism of fire and crashes of the waves.

    You will come to realise they were a springboard into your growth and evolution.

    You have come so far and oh the places you will go.

    Know that you’re allowed to start again.

    You can begin again at anytime.

    You are able to hit the reset button time and time over.

    You are allowed to become whoever you want to be.

    You are brave

    ou are not alone on this healing journey — you are so loved and supported.

    Everyone in life at some point will come to a place where they desire or need to heal.

    You are brave for being on this journey, because whilst everyone needs this journey it doesn’t mean everyone will take it.

    I see you.

    I admire you.

    I am proud of you.

    love & positivity ✨ phi

    Click here to read more

  • Find your simple joys

    Simplicity is best

    There’s something about simplicity.

    In a world where chaos and rushing rule the day.

    In a world where we are lost and caught up in our tangled minds.

    Simplicity is best.

    It’s all about the simple happy pleasures in life.

    The first sip of coffee in the morning.

    Mid afternoon naps.

    Watching the sun rise.

    Laughing with friends.

    Lemon ice tea.

    Dinner by candlelight.

    Watching the clouds go by.

    Going to bed after a busy day.

    Fresh sheets.

    Warm bread straight out of the oven.

    Morning dew.

    Rolling ocean waves.

    Walking barefoot on grass.

    Buttery popcorn.

    Making someone smile.

    Homemade pie.

    A scenic drive.

    Golden hour.

    Find your simple joys.

    Find your simple joys

    Find your simple joys because happiness doesn’t have to be complicated.

    Find your simple joys because it’s the little things in life alongside the big moments.

    Find your simple joys because otherwise life goes quick and will rush by.

    Find your simple joys ☕️

    love & positivity ✨ phi

    My book comes out in June 2023! 

    Click here to read more

  • Your healing journey

    On healing...

    Healing is a funny thing.

    It can feel so slow.

    It can feel so arduous.

    It can feel as if nothing is changing.

    It can feel like the past has a tight grip on you.

    It can feel like you are doing so much yet so little at the same time.

    It can feel like you are on the edge of an abyss slowly moving back.

    It can feel like the dark void or whole hearted fullness.

    Until one day you realise that you have come a long way, more than you thought.

    You’ll realise that healing isn’t suddenly realised in a day.

    That all along you’ve been healing and every step of progress counts whether big or small.

    Trust and have faith in your journey

    I hope you know that everything that happens in your healing journey unfolds in the way that it needs to including setbacks and mistakes.

    Everything happens as it should for your highest healing and growth.

    Trust and have faith in your journey.

    Healing looks different for everyone and healing looks incredible on you.

    In this journey be kind to yourself.

    In this journey be loving to yourself.

    In this journey be compassionate with yourself.

    For it is love that heals.

    You got this and I believe in you beautiful soul, yes you, the one reading this 🧡

    love & positivity ✨ phi

    Click here to read more

  • Finding light in the darkness

    The darkest season

    The darkest season of your life will precede your greatest breakthroughs and the emergence of light so beautiful, it will ripple and sparkle in your eyes.

    The darkest season is full of painful kisses from thorns of roses.

    The darkest season is the deep void, floating in the abyss or dwelling at rock bottom.

    The darkest season inevitably comes with the pain of shedding who you were to become more of your authentic self.

    It is all worth it for the light that will emerge once again.

    The light of the bloom.

    The light of love and self compassion.

    The light of your wings ready to soar and fly high.

    The light of your heart, full of deep gratitude and experience from the darkest season.

    Trust the magic veiled by darkness

    The darkest season will ask you to honour endings to begin again. To trust and have faith in what is happening beneath the surface.

    To surrender to the greatest mysteries.

    To be held by the divine.

    To be cradled by love.

    You are not broken.

    You are healing.

    You are being reborn.

    Trust the process.

    Trust the journey.

    Trust the magic veiled by darkness.

    It is only then you will truly come to understand why everything happens 🌹

    Under the blanket of darkness life is initiating you 🧨

    love & positivity ✨ phi

    I would love to bring light to your world and help you integrate the darkness and shadows into your life to fully bloom… 🌹

    Work with me – link in bio. Book coming June 2023 🧡

    Click here to read more

  • How to be brave…

    I think you're so brave

    I think you’re so brave.

    I think you’re so brave for getting up this morning.

    I think you’re so brave for asking for help when it all gets too much.

    I think you’re so brave for slowing down when you’re overwhelmed.

    I think you’re so brave to admit that you’re not happy.

    I think you’re so brave for letting go.

    I think you’re so brave when all you can do is collapse on the floor and cry.

    I think you’re so brave when you forgive yourself because we all make mistakes and mess up.

    I think you’re so brave for starting again.

    I think you’re so brave when you refuse to let life, labels and trauma define you.

    I think you’re so brave because even when life knocks you down, you get back up and keep going.

    How to be brave

    “Be brave” were the last words my dad ever said to me almost 10 years ago. I thought I knew what that meant.

    We often think of bravery as these life changing, huge acts that take place when bravery can be found even in what seems like the smallest of things.

    Letting yourself collapse on the floor uncontrollably crying because you can barely hold it together. The bravery in allowing yourself to feel and move through the motions.

    Admitting to yourself whilst you pretend to be happy and your life looks good on paper, acknowledging the truth that resides in your soul. That you aren’t fulfilled. The bravery is defying societal expectations and listening to your truth, your heart.

    Reaching out to a friend even though you feel bad and guilty because you’re struggling. You’re allowed to desire love and support, you’re human. The bravery in asking for what you need instead of feeling ashamed for it.

    Be brave in all moments, it counts.

    Be brave because life isn’t easy, yet you’re giving it your best go and showing up, that counts.

    love & positivity ✨ phi

    If you’re ready to face your fears and follow your dreams to the other side full of joy and soul fulfilment, let’s work together 🧡

    Click here to read more