Mental Health

  • Life isn’t easy but you were designed not only to survive but thrive.

    Life isn’t easy but you were designed not only to survive but thrive. 

    You were created to be able to withstand the hardships, the storms and enjoy the sunshine. 

    You were made to navigate it all exactly as you have for your greatest growth and expansion. 

    I hope on your darkest days you remember how unique and special you truly are. 

    You are a universe in itself and no one has experienced everything as you have. 

    No one thinks exactly the way you do. No one feels the layers and depths of emotions as you do. I hope that one bad moment never outshines the beauty and goodness of your heart and soul.

    Every individual is born with a unique blueprint, an intricate design that equips them to navigate life’s journey in a way no one else can. Your human design.

    This blueprint encompasses your innate gifts, your personality traits, and the specific challenges you’re meant to face and overcome.

    You were specially designed to handle the circumstances of your life. Whether you are introverted or extroverted, logical or creative, your unique composition allows you to approach situations in a way that is distinctively yours.

    This uniqueness is not a flaw; it is your greatest strength. Embracing it is the first step towards unlocking your full potential.

    If you’re curious about finding out more, I invite you to do a human design reading with me 🧡☺️

    love & positivity ✨ phi

    I offer 1:1 coaching and human design readings. Send me an email or DM me on Instagram to set up a free 30 minute call to see what’s right for you 🌻

    If you like my writing, you’ll love my book! 📖 The Great Unlearning: Awakening to Living an Aligned and Authentic Life by Phi Dang

    For more on all things self love, mindset, energy and purpose listen to my podcast: 🎧 Grow Through it Podcast with Phi Dang

     

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  • It’s safe to let go

    I don’t know who needs to hear this but it’s safe to let go. I

    t’s safe to surrender and trust. It’s safe to hand is over to the universe and destiny because what is meant to be will be. 

    It’s safe to relax and focus on yourself: how you’re feeling and how to move forward. It feels like the end but it’s not the total end. everything is going to to be okay. 

    There’s something new on the horizon for you and it’s going to be better than you imagined for yourself. The universe is yet to reveal it’s full hand. You are loved and you are supported.

    You’re seeing this because you were meant to 🫶🏽 I know it’s been hard but you’re strong and you’re resilient.

    May this time serve you to let go of what no longer aligns and make way for new beginnings and expansive experiences.

    More information on the Sagittarius full moon on my podcast 🎧 Grow Through it Podcast with Phi Dang

    Should you feel the pull and desire for support and guidance in what you are going through right now, I got you. I offer 1:1 coaching and human design readings. Send me an email or DM me on Instagram to set up a free 30 minute call to see what’s right for you or DM me 🌻

    If you like my writing, you’ll love my book! 📖 The Great Unlearning: Awakening to Living an Aligned and Authentic Life by Phi Dang

    Click here to read more

  • 75: Your Feelings are Always Valid

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    Let’s delve into the layered intricate world of your emotions. In this episode, we’re exploring a fundamental truth: Your feelings are always valid. In a world that often dismisses or invalidates emotions, this episode serves as a reminder that what you experience holds weight and significance. We’ll navigate the nuances of your feelings are always valid and go deeper together.

    Resources from today's episode

    Work with Phi

    Feelings and emotions: astrology and human design

    This episode is all about the feels… and you know I feel deeply with all the Scorpio in my chart (a water sign) and being an emotional authority in human design, I’m designed to deeply feel (in fact 50% of the world are emotional authorities too!).

    It was such a game changer for me learning that I am meant to be what can be labeled as emotional, sensitive or moody (many of which are likely people with an open solar plexus in human design or those who themselves are not comfortable with feeling). 

    Cultural conditioning and emotions

    Growing up with an Asian heritage as Vietnamese and Chinese, I was conditioned to keep my feelings to myself.  Emotions were reinforced as private matters, to be dealt with internally rather than expressed outwardly. This cultural upbringing instills a sense of stoicism and self-reliance, where showing vulnerability was equated with weakness. It was all about saving face, not rocking the boat, maintaining harmony even at the expense of our own emotional well-being.

    Societal conditioning, women and emotions

    It’s not just cultural conditioning either it’s also societal, the stigma surrounding women and emotions often stems from outdated societal beliefs and gender stereotypes. Women have historically been portrayed as overly emotional or irrational, undermining women’s credibility and perpetuating harmful gender norms. It’s judged upon and easily dismissed being attributed to hormonal fluctuations or back to the classic irrational it doesn’t make sense (hello emotions aren’t rational!).

    It’s hard to get it right because if you don’t display your emotions as a woman particularly warmth, you may be labelled as cold, unfeeling or lacking femininity. This double bind creates a challenging dynamic for women, as we feel pressure to navigate a narrow range of acceptable emotional expression.

    The reality is that we we live a world that sometimes dismisses or invalidates our feelings. However I truly believe this is getting better especially post pandemic with the rising awareness, interest and social recognition on the importance of mental health now more than ever. As a coach one are in particular I work on a lot with clients is to support and guide my clients into feeling their feelings. Whilst you don’t have to understand them to feel them, a lot of clients feel better when there can be an understanding of what’s going on beneath the surface which is where  I can come in with subconscious work, intuition and human design to support and assist. 

    Your feelings are always valid

    Accordingly today’s episode centres around the perspective that your feelings are always valid. You always have a right to feel what you feel. The nature of emotions is subjective. It’s the acknowledgement of hello, yes as I’m existing right now, I am feeling this, right here and now in this moment. Your feelings are valid because you feel them. 

    It’s important to remember that validating our feelings doesn’t mean we always understand them or agree with them. Emotions can be complex and nuanced, influenced by a multitude of factors such as past experiences, societal norms, and personal beliefs. However, regardless of whether others understand or validate our feelings, we have the right to honor and respect them.

    Feelings aren't logical or rational

    Whilst feelings aren’t based on logic or facts. That doesn’t take away from the importance and value of them. How we feel isn’t rational, but what we feel is very real as we experience them through our own consciousness. They stem from the depths of our subconscious. They are an integral part of what makes you human. Emotions serve as signals from your inner self, offering information and insights into your needs, desires, and experiences. Your emotions are a reflection of your unique perspective and life journey, and denying their validity can lead to repression and emotional distress.

    Your feelings are always valid but how you act upon them may not be

    It’s essential to recognise that while our emotions are valid, they are not excuses for harmful or destructive behavior. It’s not a permission slip to suddenly act however we want based on how we feel. We have to be conscious and considerate of their impact. Our feelings shouldn’t enable our actions to be unchecked. Instead, we ought to be responsible with how we approach them,
    as signals to inform our choices rather than allowing them to control us. 

    This requires a level of self-awareness and self-regulation, acknowledging our feelings without letting them overpower our sense of reason and consideration of self and others around us. To simply put, it may be helpful to see it from the perspective internally how we feel is always valid but what we do with it externally may not warrant that same validation in proportion to the feeling. 

    It’s helpful to check in with yourself, do you have the power to be mindful of your emotions or have your emotions got power over you? Who is the driving force behind the wheel?

    Taking responsibility for what you do with how you feel

    Taking responsibility for our actions means acknowledging the impact they may have on ourselves and others, even when they stem from valid emotions. Instead of allowing our feelings to dictate our behavior without question, we can cultivate mindfulness and self-awareness to respond to our emotions in a way that aligns with our values and principles. 

    This involves pausing and reflecting before acting impulsively, considering the consequences of our actions, and choosing responses in alignment with our best selves. By taking ownership of our behaviours and actions, even in the face of challenging emotions, we empower ourselves to navigate life with integrity, awareness and authenticity. This is how we use our emotions to cultivate emotional intelligence. It is also a responsibility and empowerment that your feelings belong to you. However they are.

    Visceral reactions to feelings

    It gets more challenging when we have raw feelings that lead to visceral reactions that are hard to manage. It’s like being caught in a whirlwind, where every thought and sensation swirls around us magnitude and force. In those moments, it feels like you’ve lost control. Yet, even in the midst of such turmoil, it’s essential to recognise that you aren’t your emotions or feelings. They are transient states that pass through us, like clouds drifting across the sky. Understanding this can help us weather the storm with greater resilience and clarity.

    Having such feelings can be scary and lead to suppression but it’s got that pressure cooker effect, they will build up until they inevitably explode, causing even more turmoil and distress. As they say the body keeps score too, and it may lead to physical symptoms within the body such as constipation and repression of feelings. In these moments it’s a call to get grounded and to regulate our nervous system such as through breathing.

    Your feelings are always valid but not always true

    More over your feelings are always valid but they’re not always true. Our feelings often arise with thoughts and the creation of emotional narratives. It’s our mind taking liberty and reign to create our conditioning and programming. For example, you feel extremely anxious about an upcoming presentation at work. Your heart is racing, your palms are sweaty, and you can’t shake the feeling of impending doom. These feelings are undoubtedly real to you, but that doesn’t necessarily mean your presentation will be as dire as your emotions suggest.

    In reality, you’ve they’ve prepared thoroughly for the presentation for weeks in advance and have received positive feedback from multiple people. The anxiety might stem from past experiences or a fear of failure rather than any actual indication that you will present poorly.

    How to validate your feelings

    Given all this what are some practices you can introduce to validate your own feelings? At the core of it is listening. So many of us can be scared as to what arises or live in the mindset ignorance is bliss. Meditation is a beautiful way to allow yourself to observe thoughts and feelings within your own body. We shift more into the body with a conscious scan to notice physical sensations whereas journaling is a conscious scan of the mind. From there it can be helpful to express your feelings to process them whether it’s labelling your emotions to figure out the nuances or a creative means like art or dance.

    Ultimately validating your feelings doesn’t mean you have to agree with them or act on them. It simply means acknowledging and accepting them as valid aspects of your experience. This paves the way for greater self awareness and consciousness in your growth journey. If you’re looking to work on feeling your feelings, deepening your emotional intelligence and strengthening your connection to your heart and emotions, I’d love to help! 

    I offer 1:1 coaching session and human design readings to help you. More information available on my website phidang.com or my Instagram @thephidang, please reach out I would love to hear from you. Until next time beautiful soul, love and positivity. 

    Let’s work together through 1:1 coaching and/or a human design reading. 

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  • Life is a divine Miracle

    Questions to your thoughts and beliefs around timelines in life

    Why do you have to get married by a certain age? Why do you have to be at the top of your career ladder by a particular age?

    Do you live based on timelines

    Life is a string of moments, and each moment counts. Where you are right now is where you’re meant to be. Life is a divine miracle unfolding in real time. At any moment, at any chance, life can change.

    Come back to presence, come back to living in there here and now…

    📖 The Great Unlearning by Phi Dang
    🎥 @platoux

    love & positivity ✨ phi

    Ready to make each moment of your life count? Let’s work together through 1:1 coaching or a human design reading: Visit the website links.

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  • Life is tough, but so are you

    Life is tough, but...

    🧠 I keep messing up

    🧠 I feel defeated

    🧠 I won’t make it

    🧠 What’s the point

    🫀 Keep going

    🫀 Better days are coming

    🫀 Life is tough but so are you.

    What no one is talking about...

    It’s easy to get caught up in the belief that life seems easy and effortless all the time for everyone except you, that there must be something wrong with you because you are struggling and haven’t achieved the same amount as that person or done a lot like the other.

    The truth is life is hard inherently, life isn’t meant for your happiness, or at least just that… 💣

    Life is orchestrated for your growth and expansion 💥

    There will be tough times but if you’re honest, in those moments don’t you seem to change the most?

    The uncomfortable, the hard and discomfort help you to grow (it doesn’t feel like it at the time and often does looking back).

    Life is tough, but so are you 👊🏽

    I wrote the following in my book 📖 The Great Unlearning;

    “I know some days turn into nights and everything seems so unbearable you want to escape into darkness. When everything is dark, don’t forget about the light. Turn within and whisper to your soul. Place your hand over your heart and feel the devotion that beats for you. Some of the best days of your life are yet to happen. Some of the best moments of your life are yet to be had. Some of the unforgettable memories are yet to be made. The people you’ll meet are yet to be met. The souls you’ll fall in love with are yet to be loved. The excitement you’ll have that’s yet to unfold. The mystery and magic of life that’s waiting to reveal itself. Hold on because you’re only on a single page while novels are being written within you.” 🪄

    This is your sign to keep going, tough times aren’t the end, maybe they are a beautiful new beginning…

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  • Healing is a journey

    Healing is a funny thing

    Healing is a funny thing.

    It can feel slow.

    It can feel as if nothing has changed.

    It can feel like you are doing so much yet so little at the same time.

    It can feel like the dark void, and it can feel like the fullness.

    And then, one day, you’ll realise how far you’ve come.

    You’ll realise that healing isn’t sudden.

    You’ll realise that you’ve been healing the whole time.

    Keep going, because you are healing

    Every step counts whether big or small.

    Healing and recovery aren’t a race so you don’t need a timer.

    There are some things you simply can’t rush. Setbacks happen. That doesn’t mean you won’t heal.

    So keep going, because you are healing ❤️‍🩹

    📖 The Great Unlearning by Phi Dang

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  • To truly be alive…

    On your death bed...

    On your death bed, you won’t wish you’d worked more hours.

    You’ll wish you spent less time working and more time with your loved ones.

    On your death bed, you won’t wish your body was different.

    You will wish you appreciated your body more for its strength and grace.

    On your death bed, you won’t wish you were just like everyone else.

    You will wish you stayed true to yourself and stood out from the masses.

    What you should be afraid of is never truly living…

    To be truly alive...

    What’s scary? To have an unlived life.

    What will it take for you to truly realise life is precious?

    There is no guarantee in life except that you will die. This is death’s greatest gift to us.

    Knowing this is an opportunity to live.

    To truly be alive ❤️‍🔥

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  • The sun needs the moon

    The sun can't be the moon...

    It’s easy to feel tiny and insignificant when there’s almost 7.8 billion of us.

    We do a great job of recognising how amazing and special other people are but forget our own strengths and specialties.

    The sun and moon are great, yet the sun is special in its own way and so is the moon.

    The sun can’t be the moon or do its job and if it could we would lose out on the sun!

    Your existence is needed.

    Being you

    You would be missed by so many people if you weren’t here.

    Your life causes ripple effects throughout the world even if you don’t think so.

    That drunk girl you spoke to in the bathroom is thanking her stars she met you on a night out and finally got around to dumping her toxic ex.

    Your local barista who remembers your order off by heart not only because you order regularly but also because they appreciate you.

    That donation you made to charity has changed someone’s life and you’ll never even know about it.

    Significance isn’t about being here.

    Showing up.

    Being you 🧡

    📖 The Great Unlearning by Phi Dang
    🎥 @secondsbymaya

    love & positivity ✨ phi

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  • The greatest gift of all

    Do not be afraid...

    Perhaps the light is absent because we still have a few things we need to understand about the darkness.

    Do not be afraid of darkness for you have the capacity to plunge into the depths of the ocean that is your soul. 

    I hope you remember...

    When everything seems too hard, I hope you remember the strength and resilience that has kept you here despite all the hardships and heartache you’ve endured.

    I hope you remember how deeply you’re loved.

    I hope you remember how much you’ve grown. I hope you remember the purity and innocence of your heart, with its vast capacity to love.

    I hope you remember how incredible it is that you’re here and get to experience the greatest gift of all: life.

    📖 The Great Unlearning by Phi Dang

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