• 09: How to Create and Have Success in 2021

    Episode Summary of The Grow Through It Podcast with Phi Dang, 09: How to Create and Have Success in 2021

    Learn about the #1 Mistake people make when it comes to success in addition to practical tips and strategies on how to create and have success. I also do a Q&A on all things success from how to stay motivated, being successful during times of uncertainty and a lack of resources such as money when it comes to having success.

    What you'll learn from this episode

    • The #1 Mistake People Make When it Comes to Creating Change and Success
    • Why Getting Started is Always the Hardest 
    • Why There is No Such Thing As Success Without Failure
    • How to Achieve Your Goals and Success
    • Habit Stacking
    • How to Prioritise Your Goals and Success
    • How to Stay Motivated To Hit Your Goals
    • How to Achieve Your Goals and Be Successful during Times of Uncertainty
    • How to Achieve Your Goals and Be Successful without Resources such as Money

    Key Quotes from this Episode

    Don’t let others or society define it for you, figure out what success is for you.

    The outer world is a reflection of your inner world.

    You can create the reality and results you want. But guess what? You aren’t entitled to that without doing the work.

    Featured Resources on the episode

    The Grow Through It Podcast with Phi Dang, 09: How to Create and Have Success in 2021 - Show Transcript

    You are listening to episode 9 of the Grow Through It Podcast with Phi Dang: How to Create and Have Success in 2021.

    [Introduction to the Grow Through It Podcast With Phi Dang plays – Background Music: upbeat, confident, rising beat]:

    Don’t just go through life, grow through it. Don’t just go through life, grow through it.

    Hi and Welcome to the Grow Through It Podcast with Phi Dang.

    My name is Phi and I am a Clarity and Confidence Life Coach known as the “The Positivity Queen.”

    My passion is to help you go from stuck and self critical to courageous and empowered so you can conquer anything.

    Join me, every Tuesday, as I discuss all things mindset, self love, energy and purpose.

    This podcast won’t just inspire and motivate you, it will also provide practical tips and strategies you can implement in your daily life.

    Ready to grow? Let’s grow!

    [Grow Through It Podcast With Phi Dang End of Intro]

    [Episode 09 – How to Create and Have Success in 2021 Begins]

    Hello beautiful souls.

    Happy 2021! 

    This is going to be your best year yet, I just know it. 

    If anyone hasn’t told you already, I have full faith in you.

    I have full faith because you are here, listening to the first episode for 2021 of the Grow Through It Podcast with Phi Dang. 

    By doing this, you are intentionally setting time aside for you. 

    To work on yourself, to create success for yourself – so congratulations, I’m proud of you! 

    A mindset open to learning and prioritising their self development and growth is always going to be successful.

    People like you, are the people I love to work with in my 1:1 coaching program. 

    If you are the type of person who loves personal development through books, courses and podcasts and you are ready for the next step, to supercharge and accelerate your growth, let’s chat – I have limited 1:1 coaching spots left for this first quarter of this year as I am so happy to have 3 of you beautiful souls join me last week! 

    Now as you gathered from the title, this podcast is all about creating and having a successful 2021. 

    In this modern day and age, we know that success looks different to everyone, it’s a matter of defining your success. For some it will be money, for others it will be a running a huge marathon.

    Don’t let others or society define it for you, figure out what success is for you.

    When we talk success, in this episode its in the framework of achieving your goals because I know goals are at the top of many people’s minds when it come to a new year.

    Now I also know a lot of other podcasts and all the freebies, motivational speakers and influencers talk about how to create successful goals, for me that’s something that I do with my 1:1 coaching clients as it’s very personal. This podcast will focus more on the journey of achieving goals and your success. 

    So let’s begin.

    The #1 Mistake People Make When it Comes to Creating Change and Success

    I want to lay down for you a foundational base for creating success. To do that I want to first of all address the #1 mistake people make when it comes to creating change based on my experience as a life coach with clients from all over the world.

    People try to change their reality by changing the outside world.

    This is a thought error.

    The outside world is just circumstances.

    Circumstances are neutral.

    The factor that will truly shift and create change for you is your thoughts. 

    Your thoughts cause your feelings.

    Your feelings cause your actions.

    Your actions cause your results.

    So to truly change anything it begins in your thoughts because your thoughts are in your control.

    If you don’t agree with my statement, you have work to do. 

    If you don’t understand why, let’s chat because this is the realm I work within as a life coach.

    Most people go around this world on auto-pilot dangerously in their mind. They believe whatever goes on in their brain and they don’t intentionally choose their thoughts!

    When you don’t intentionally choose your thoughts, you choose to believe the negativity that goes in on your mind that’s formed over years of subconscious programming.

    Then you go around life not knowing why you feel bad on a regular basis and you don’t know what to do with those thoughts. The lines become blurry. You don’t know how to change your thought process or how to process your emotions.

    It’s not a surprise and it’s not your fault. We don’t learn about this at school, at university or even in our jobs.

    We only truly learn about this when we work on ourselves through personal development, when we invest in a coach.

    Your thoughts are your inner work.

    The outer world is a reflection of your inner world.

    For example if you have a chaotic mind, you’ll find more often than not a messy, disorganised home.

    If you’re finding it hard to find love, it’s because you don’t truly love yourself.

    If you’re finding it hard to make money, it’s because you have a scarcity mindset.

    Trying to change your reality by changing the outside world, is like trying to change white wine to red wine by adding food colouring. 

    If you want actual change, you have to go to the source.

    If you want the wine to actually change, you have to use a different variety of grapes.

    If you want your reality to change, you have to fo the source: you, your thoughts. 

    Zero to One

    In the journey for change and success, the first step is always the hardest.

    First of all, when you want to do something new, you’re starting at zero.

    You have no track record or experience.

    You have no momentum.

    There’s nothing.

    More than anything, it takes determination, energy and effort to go from zero to one than it does to get to get from any other steps after that.

    After that, every step is easier than the first.

    You can achieve the goals you set.

    You can create the reality and results you want.

    But guess what? You aren’t entitled to that without doing the work.

    You have the do the work.

    You have to earn your results.

    Now zero to one is the hardest but don’t let that stop you.

    You can do hard things.

    You were made for hard things.

    There is no such thing as success without failure

    We cannot discuss success without failure.

    Guess what, success and failure go hand in hand.

    You can’t choose whether you will succeed or fail because failure is always going to be a part of success. You can only choose what kind of failure you are going to have.

    The only real failure in my eyes is to not try at all or to use it as an excuse to quit.

    Further to this, allow yourself to grow. Give yourself permission to grow.

    When you plant seeds in the garden, you don’t check every day to see if they have instantly bloomed.

    You simply water them everyday, clear the weeds and know that in time they will grow.

    Breathe easy beautiful soul, it will happen – let things unfold as they are meant to.

    How do you achieve your goals?

    If anyone tells you there’s a secret to making it happen, there isn’t.

    There’s no magic formula or button, it truly is just doing the work.

    It is overwhelming to go from 0 to 100 but it’s much easier to go from 0 to 1 to 2 to 3.

    The key to success is consistency and knowing that every little bit counts even just 1%.

    The pain you feel today, becomes the strength of your tomorrow 

    What can you do everyday to get you one step closer to your goal?

    Think of success like a ladder.

    To get to the top of the ladder sure you could leap from 0 to 4 rungs or even jump from rung 3 to rung 7 but when you do that, not only is it harder and requires more energy, you may fall in the process of doing so.

    Consistency on the ladder is going up steadily one rung at a time..


    Further to this, let us sprinkle accountability into the mix.

    How different is it when you write down a goal in your journal and tell no one vs have a life coach checking in with you weekly asking if you’ve done what you needed to do that week to make your goal happen and post about your goal openly on social media?

    Very different right?

    Studies have shown that when you share your goals with others, you are twice as likely to achieve them than if you keep the goals to yourself. 

    When you don’t share your goals in some way, you aren’t truly committed to them. It’s very easy to give up because it’s like they never really existed.

    Another reason why accountability works is well we are human and we want to save face.

    Your reputation is on the line to loved ones, to people you know, to strangers on the internet. You want to fulfil the expectations that others have of you. 

    A life coach is worth the investment as there isn’t the strain of telling a loved one or friend. A coach does not judge, scold or blame, your coach is there to support you every step of the way, help you develop strategies to overcome obstacles and help you realise what works for you and what does not.

    So far everything I’ve discussed cements the fact that success is not an accident.

    Success is intentional.

    Habits play deeply into success as they account for about 40 percent of our behaviours on any given day. 

    Let’s pause for a moment to consider this.

    Almost half of the things you do on any day isn’ a result of conscious decisions but behaviours that you have repeated so many times they have become more or less automatic. 

    You no longer think about them, there’s no mind drama, you just do them.

    It has been widely said that it takes 21 days to make a habit, so I’m not going to go into this.

    Rather I want to introduce the concept of habit stacking with you

    Habit Stacking

    Habit stacking uses the habits you already have and using the power of connection to create new habits.

    It makes sense right, you’ve already done something so much it’s almost auto pilot – if you use that as a foundational base to make a new habit, it’s more likely to stick.

    Habit stacking goes like this

    After or Before [CURRENT HABIT], I will [NEW HABIT].

    Simple examples could be:

    Before I eat breakfast, I will write down 3 things I am grateful for.

    After I brush my teeth, I will take a minute to meditate.

    Before I check my phone in the morning, I will stretch for 5 minutes. 

    So when I discussed the topic of goal setting and success on my Instagram you beautiful souls had a variety questions that I would like to answer. A Q&A a on goal setting and success.

    How do you prioritise your goals and success?

    When it comes to prioritising, think of it like this.

    Everyone in the world has 24 hours including Beyonce, Oprah, Elon Musk. What are you doing with every hour you get?

    Is what you are doing helping you get closer to your goal? 

    Another useful tool is to use a decision matrix, how important is the task and how urgent is the task? 

    How do you stay motivated towards your goals and success?

    Always know your purpose.

    A great exercise for this is something I learnt from The Life Coach school. It’s called the 3-2-1 method.

    Everyday write down your goal followed by 3 reasons why it is important to you, 2 reasons why you are equiped to make it happen and 1 thing you’ll do today to move closer to making it happen.

    If you’re struggling to understand the purpose of your goal, use the 5 whys technique. 

    Ask yourself why, 5 times until you distill it down.

    For example:

    I want to get fit

    1st why? To be skinnier

    2nd why? So I can fit into my clothes

    3rd why? So I can wear the new clothes I bought

    4th why? These new clothes make me feel attractive and confident

    5th why? They show off my figure. I want to feel attractive and confident to call in a relationship into my life. To feel so much love not only for my partner but for me too.

    Realise this, when you chase a goal you’re chasing the feeling you get by achieving the goal. Most of the time it’s about feeling good.

    The great thing about feelings is you can also conjure up feelings by recalling memories right?

    If you want to feel happy, think about times where you have felt so much joy, you were laughing.

    If you want to feel sad, think about times where you have experienced heart ache and pain.

    If you want to feel confident, think about times where you felt at your best.

    Let’s tie this into achieving our goals and the realm of success.

    Let’s time leap and think about the you who achieves your goals this year.

    What does the future you who achieved your goal think?

    How does the future you who achieved your goal feel?

    What does the future you do?

    Taste it for a moment.

    Your subconscious can’t help but latch on and work in the background to find a way to make it happen.

    Not only that, how do you embody future you right now?

    What about achieving your goals and having success during times of uncertainty?

    Life is always going to be changing, change is the only constant.

    No matter what you need to have confidence in yourself.

    When you are confident in yourself, it doesn’t matter what is happening in the external world.

    The outside world doesn’t define who you are and what you can do, you do.

    Your job doesn’t define you, how much money you make, your relationship, how much you do, you do.

    You control your thoughts, you control your belief, you control your decisions.

    You know you can do hard things.

    You know you will find a way to make it happen.

    You know that you will figure it out.

    Self confidence is having belief in yourself.

    It’s taking the leap through the faith.

    Is reality controlling you or are you making the most of the current reality? 

    Think about this analogy, that you are at a casino playing blackjack.

    Whatever cards you get, your goal is to win. 

    You can’t control the cards you are being dealt, but what you do with those cards you control that. You also control your appearance, do you look confident with your hand or are you truly confident with your hand. Do you look defeated by your cards but secretly you know you have been dealt amazing cards?

    That doesn’t mean you’ll always win with every hand but thats okay right? Just because you lose one round doesn’t make you a terrible player. Just because you’ve been losing consistently doesn’t mean you’ll always lose. The tides turn. After all you can win big in just one round and leave.

    What if I don't have enough resources to make my goals happen and be successful?

    This one really ties into a scarcity vs abundance mindset.

    Scarcity says why is this happening to me. Abundance says what is here for me.

    Focus on what you do have, when you notice the good things in your life, you can’t help but feel more abundant. 

    An abundant mindset looks for opportunities and understands the more you give, the more you will get.

    For example, if it’s money – the most incredible thing of our time is the internet. There are SO many free resources out there. In exchange for money, you may exchange time because you need to filter out all the information to find out work best for you, you need to try and learn along the way.

    Instead of I can’t afford that, think how can I afford that.

    Are you conscious of where your current resources are going? Your time, your effort, your energy?

    Most of the time we think we are but we can’t account for minute to minute of our time or dollar to dollar. 

    This truly is a hard one but I truly understand. 

    In 2020 I spent $10,000 on my self development during a global pandemic. What I realised though is I had more money than I thought. The money that I used to use on frivolous things like new clothes, Ubers, dining out and takeaway was now funding my development as a life coach through taking courses and having my own coaches.

    The Grow Through It Podcast with Phi Dang, 09: How to Create and Have Success in 2021 - Close

    This episode has been like a mini intensive on how to set yourself up for success in 2021. 

    I wanted to close this episode with some quotes and food for thought.

    “There is no elevator to success, you have to take the stairs.”

    “The road to success and the road to failure are almost exactly the same.”

    “Successful people do what unsuccessful people are not willing to do. Don’t wish it were easier; wish you were better.”

     “If you are not willing to risk the usual, you will have to settle for the ordinary.”

    “I never dreamed about success, I worked for it.”

    Thank you so much for listening to this episode on creating success in 2021. I am so excited for all the things to come this year. Watch this space! If you have any episode suggestions, please get in touch as I’m always looking for new ideas to explore.

    Not only that, as I mentioned earlier, I have limited 1:1 coaching spots left so if you are interested and want me by your side in 2021, let’s chat, I would love to help you.

    I hope you all have an absolutely incredible 2021 full of joy and success.

    Love and positivity, chat to you next Tuesday.

    [Episode 09 – How to Create and Have Success in 2021 Ends]

    Are you wanting to find out more about 1:1 Coaching or working with me? Maybe perhaps you want to know more about me. I’d love to connect with you. You can visit my website or connect with me on Instagram @thephidang. Speak to you soon.

    Click here to read more

  • 7 Online communities for women supporting women

    The popularity of social media and increased time we all spend online has led to the massive growth in online female communities. As a result, there has been a rise in online female communities for women supporting women. These communities are inspirational because they enable women to connect and network with each other. A supportive environment for sisterhood to help each other, businesses and side hustles.


    The BossBabe website
    The BossBabe website

    About BossBabe

    BossBabe is an online community for unapologetically ambitious women who know what they want. As a result, BossBabe is online female community empowers budding female entrepreneurs and business owners with a kit for success.

    Who is the founder of BossBabe?

    BossBabe was originally founded by Alex Wolf. It’s fascinating you can watch the old BossBabe material here: Original BossBabe YouTube. Wolf founded BossBabe at the age of 22! After hitting a quarter of a million followers, she sold the company at 25. Wolf now is a consultant and speaker, with an online educational platform Creative Business School.

    BossBabe is now run by Natalie Elizabeth Ellis and Dr. Danielle Canty who are the cofounders and CO-CEOs. In a BossBabe podcast episode on ‘The One Thing You Need For a Thriving Business Relationship’ the two shared how they live and work together.

    Both entrepreneurs have turned BossBabe is a huge powerhouse in the female community. You only have the look up the #bossbabe hashtag all over social media. They have over 16M followers and 1.9M+ members in their social media community.

    What do you get from BossBabe?

    The Société is the BossBabe membership program which includes an instant success kit upon joining. The membership is paid and private for female entrepreneurs to connect, build and grow. In terms of other resources, the BossBabe team have a blog and podcast in addition to running events.

    Examples of content:

    Cost of BossBabe?

    $35USD a month = $420USD a year. It is important to note, that they do offer free advice. They do this on their Instagram and on their site through blog posts and their podcast.

    Business Chicks

    The Business Chicks website
    The Business Chicks website

    About Business Chicks

    Business Chicks is Australia’s largest and most influential community for women. They also have a presence in New York and Europe. Business Chicks openly advocate that their membership is not just for women in ‘business.’ They warmly endorse that Business Chicks is about helping all women play a bigger game.

    Who is the founder of Business Chicks?

    Emma Isaacs is the founder and Global CEO of Business Chicks. Isaacs ran her own recruitment company from the age of 18. During her time she was asked to run an event for a group called Business Chicks. The rest is history as they say as she went onto acquire the group and shape it into what it is today. Emma has grown the the small Business Chicks group of 250 members into a community of thousands of engaged women.

    What do you get from Business Chicks?

    Business Chicks has over 100 Business Chicks events annually. They have high profile guests such as Brené Brown, Arianna Huffington, Nicole Kidman, Sophia Amoruso, Nigella Lawson and Jay Shetty. If you’re interested in what their Masterclasses are like refer to our Business Chicks Review on the Jay Shetty Masterclass. Business Chicks truly is an open community where non members are able to book a masterclass too. Their members do receive discounts and special members only workshops.

    Examples of content include:

    Cost of Business Chicks

    Business Chicks is a paid membership at $199AUD a year and $9.99 joining fee. Benefits include and are not limited to access to their Masterclasses, connecting with other members and a subscription to their magazine Latte.


    The Girl Boss website
    The Girl Boss website

    About Girlboss

    Girlboss is for millennial women progressing whether that is personally or professionally. Their values are humour, vulnerability, curiosity and inclusivity. GirlBoss is an online community providing a place to network alongside resources and tools to progress.

    Who is the founder of Girlboss?

    Sophia Amoruso is the original Girlboss who is known for being the founder of clothing empire Nasty Gal. The humble Nasty Gal Vintage eBay store turned into one of the fastest growing online boutiques, Nasty Gal. In 2014 her autobiography was titled #GIRLBOSS. Amorouso went on to create Girl Boss Media, a company geared towards a female audience. In 2017 she launched the Girlboss platform. The rising success led to her selling Girlboss in 2019 to Attention Capital. Amouruso remains on the board of Girlboss.

    What do you get from Girlboss?

    Girlboss is a like minded community to connect and network with, They have weekly Digital Firesides with today’s thought leaders such as Payal Kadakia founder of ClassPass. Additionally they run a blog and have a video library full of resources. The Girlboss blog covers a huge range of topics such as work, money, wellness, beauty and life.

    Examples of content include:

    Cost of Girlboss?

    Hub Dot

    The Hub Dot website
    The Hub Dot website

    The Girlboss platform is open and free to anyone.

    About Hub Dot

    Hub Dot is a professional network for women that has its origins in London. They believe in connecting people to bridge the gaps, strip away labels and level the playing field. Their values are community, authenticity, humanity, sharing and trust. Hub Dot runs events through a system of five dots which replace job titles and social status.

    Who is the founder of Hub Dot?

    Simona Barbieri is the founder of Hub Dot. In Simona’s interview with Look Magazine, she speaks about the origins of Hub Dot. She was having a coffee with a bunch of friends, when a friend made a comment about feeling ‘stuck’. She wanted to help and saw the potential of connecting individual powers to make ‘things happen’. That was the beginning of what we she calls Dot Alchemy – Dots intersecting to share stories and transform.

    What do you get from Hub Dot?

    The Hub Dot events as mentioned run on a system of five dots which reflect different mindsets. The mindsets range from being new, being established, looking for inspiration or networking or being compelled to tell your story. They have run events in over 25 cities in person and now run online Hub Dot Live Piazzas. This enables women from all over the world to join.

    Cost of Hub Dot?

    Previously physical Hub Dot events are ticketed to pay for logistics and operations. As a result of a growing network, the virtual ones are now free and are supported through donations.

    Kool Kanya

    The Kool Kanya website
    The Kool Kanya website

    About Kool Kanya

    Kool Kanya is an online female community started in India. The community offers career advice and platform for women to share about jobs, careers, health and lifestyle. Kool Kanya was built to be a nurturing ecosystem for women to connect with each other and build careers they love.

    Who is the founder of Kool Kanya?

    Vanshika Goenka is the founder of Kool Kanya. In 2017, she was doing market research for a sanitary pad company. Whilst doing so, she realised it was a room full of men discussing how to better a product only for women. Goenka came to the realisation of a skewed gender ratio in the Indian workplace. As such, she was determined to create a community of women and Kool Kanya was born.

    What do you get from Kool Kanya?

    Kool Kanya is a safe space for women to connect with each other and ask questions. They provide career advice through their Power Reads in addition to running events and helping members find a mentor. Their values are transparency, empathy, self-drive, failing forward and user centric.

    Examples of content:

    Cost of Kool Kanya?

    Kool Kanya is free and open to join!


    TwoXChromosomes website
    The TwoXChromosomes website

    About TwoXChromosomes

    TwoXChromosomes is a subreddit intended for women’s perspectives on the meaningful and silly. At current there are 12.7M members of the community and at the time of writing 4.5K were active online. In 2014 TwoXChromosomes was made a default community. This meant that everyone could see the community regardless a Reddit member or not. The community name “XX” is not meant to be specifically inclusive or exclusive of anyone.

    Who is the founder of TwoXChromosomes?

    According to Dailydot’s profile of the TwoXChromosomes community, the founder is a username by the name of HiFructoseCornFece. She is only known by her username which is fair enough for privacy and out of respect. In the article she says, “There is something for most everyone in 2XC, regardless of age or gender.”

    “There was definitely not one singular place or person to whom I could have gone five years ago for advice on birth control, girl friendships, love, sex, workplace survival, waxing, makeup, bras, no-heat curls, and life crises. I think it’s sanded off some of my cynicism to see that kind of support and camaraderie. We’re all pioneering this weird existence together.”

    What do you get from TwoXChromosomes?

    Conversation and connection in relation to the existence and/or experience of girlhood is on the community. They are platform for insightful dialogue, laughter, and community.

    Popular all time posts according the stats of the TwoXChromosomes include:

    Cost of TwoXChromosomes?

    The community is free to join, you will just need a Reddit account to post otherwise you can lurk on the pages.

    Women Who

    About Women Who

    Women Who website
    The Women Who website

    Women Who is a community for working women dedicated to helping women think, work, and live better. The create environments the enable connection, to share information and to have fun. The aim of Women Who is to help women get where they want to be.

    Who is the founder of Women Who?

    Otegha Uwagba is the founder of Women Who. Her interview with Elle, How I Quit My Job To Launch A Women’s Network details the origins of Women Who. Having an advertising background, she worked at VICE. After a year of working there, she quit without knowing what to do next. Uwagba had an idea that had been growing for a while to create an online platform. She wanted the platform to spotlight and supports creative working women who are figuring things out.

    What do you get from Women Who?

    They have a newsletter, podcast, worksheets in addition to running workshops and events.

    Examples of content include:

    Cost of Women Who?

    The worksheets are at a cost of $20-30 GBP. Their newsletter and podcast is free.

    Get involved in online communities, support other women and connect
    Get involved in online communities, support other women and connect

    In conclusion of online communities for women supporting women

    The world is an incredible place compared to many years ago. Women used to face many more challenges and obstacles existed for women. We now live in a society that is moving towards championing flourishing women.

    Women who support other women. Connection over community. Above all, there are a range of communities available for women that are not restricted to this list. Community can start from your local neighbourhood all the way to the big global community that exists today thanks to the internet.

    Get involved! Become a part of an online female community. There is nothing to fear or worry about. There is so much to gain by being part of an online community for women. Benefits range from connecting with others, making friends, learning how to improve not only your business or career, but yourself.

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  • Inspirational quotes that will cheer you up

    Feeling down? We all experience ‘good’ and ‘bad’ days, ups and downs, wins and losses.

    When times get hard it can be nice to read some inspiring quotes that will cheer you up.

    These quotes may also help you a cheer someone up such as a loved one such as a friend, family member or partner.

    Radiate love and it will be contagious 🙂

    They serve as reminder of how incredible you are.

    They serve as a prompt to reframe your thoughts and see an issue from a different perspective.

    They serve as a reminder of the love that surrounds you.

    Here are some quotes that will cheer you up. They will instil love and positivity within you.

    Hopefully these inspiring quotes will bring a smile to your face or a bright moment.

    It is important to note that it is okay to feel down or sad at times, we are human and this is normal. Honour yourself and allow yourself to process what you are feeling before moving on.

    “Everyone deserves a sad day once in a while,” Calista told me. “Sometimes things are too big for cheering up. Sometimes the best way to make things better is just to let yourself be sad for a little bit.”

    Lisa Graff

    Note if you are feeling down – reach out to someone you trust, someone who loves you. You are strong for reaching out. Talk to them. Be in silence with them. Just know you are never alone. If you don’t have someone please contact a medical professional such as your doctor or a psychologist who can help.

    Sending love, light and positivity always.

    Inspirational quotes that will cheer you up

    Stay focused on what you desire and want to achieve, it will provide the motivation you need.

    “When everything feels like an uphill struggle, just think of the view from the top.”


    You are alive! 🙂 Today may be your day!

    If you are still breathing maybe it is not such a bad day after all.     

    Darren E. Laws

    Find a reason to be positive – you can do it! Change your thoughts and change your world.

    If you’ve got nothing to dance about, find a reason to sing.     

    Melody Carstairs

    Find the light within you.

    Instead of cursing the darkness, light a candle.     

    Benjamin Franklin

    No situation is permanent.

    “The bad news is nothing lasts forever,
    The good news is nothing lasts forever.”

    J. COLE

    You offer something unique to this world.

    “There’s something in you that the world needs.”


    Spread the love.

    The best way to cheer yourself is to try to cheer someone else up.     

    Mark Twain

    Enjoy ever moment before it becomes a memory.

    Enjoy the little things and be joyful,for one day you may look back and realize they were actually the things that mattered!     


    No one can take away the successes you have already had.

    “No matter what, nobody can take away the dances you’ve already had.”

    Gabriel Garcia Marquez

    Be at peace knowing everything happens for a reason and one day you will realise why.

    “Someday, everything will make perfect sense. So for now, laugh at the confusion, smile through the tears, and keep reminding yourself that everything happens for a reason.”


    Sometimes when things are falling apart they may actually be falling into place. 


    Tough times in our life teach us lessons.

    “Stars can’t shine without darkness.”


    Keep moving forward.

    “Don’t look back, you’re not going that way.”


    “I’ve missed more than 9000 shots in my career. I’ve lost almost 300 games. Twenty-six times I’ve been trusted to take the game winning shot and missed. I’ve failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed.” 

    Michael Jordan

    Whatever we endure, prepares us for the future.

    “Hardships often prepare ordinary people for an extraordinary destiny.”

    C.S. LEWIS

    It’s all about perspective.

    “I didn’t fail the test, I just found 100 ways to do it wrong.”

    Benjamin Franklin

    Failure doesn’t exist, you get something out of everything, one of the best? A lesson learnt.

    “There are no failures – just experiences and your reactions to them.”

    Tom Krause

    “Don’t be discouraged by a failure. It can be a positive experience. Failure is, in a sense, the highway to success, in as much as every discovery of what is false leads us to seek earnestly after what is true, and every fresh experience points out some form of error which we shall afterwards carefully avoid.”

    John Keats

    Turn your wounds into wisdom. 


    You are resilient.

    Tough times don’t last. Tough people do. 

    Robert H. Schuller

    We can turn pain into motivation.

    We must embrace pain and burn it as fuel for our journey. 

    Kenji Miyazawa

    Embrace the present moment.

    Life isn’t about waiting for the storm to pass. It’s about learning how to dance in the rain. 

    Vivian Greene

    Tough times teach us a lot about ourselves and how strong we truly are.

    It’s in the darkest moments that we find our greatest strengths. 

    Steven Atchson

    You were given this life because you are strong enough to live it. 


    Tough times prompt change for the better.

    Pain doesn’t just show up in our lives for no reason. It’s a sign that something in our lives needs to change. 


    Rough times lead to opportunities.

    In the middle of a difficulty lies opportunity.

    Albert Einstein

    Change leads to transformation.

    What the caterpillar calls the end of the world, the master calls a butterfly. 

    Richard Bach

    Accept where you are now and find inner peace.

    The secret of being happy is accepting where you are in life and making the most out of every day. 


    You have the power to cheer yourself up. You are powerful.

    It only takes one person to make you happy and change your life: YOU. 

    Charles Orlando

    Be brave, you may not be able to change what is happening but you can let go in your mind. Read here for more on true acceptance.

    One of the happiest moments ever, is when you find the courage to let go of what you can’t change. 


    Feeling down and need more cheering up? Please turn to these resources

    Beyond Blue – Australia

    Feeling Down? 7 Ways to Pick Yourself Back Up!Zen Habits

    Low mood, sadness and depression – NHS UK

    Help Guide – USA

    The LifeLine – Canada

    Additional resources at in her vitality

    Click here to read more

  • Change your thoughts and change your world

    Change your thoughts and change your world.

    Let’s think deeply on this. What does this mean?

    At times, there are so many thoughts that run through our mind.

    Our thoughts influence our attitude, our perception, our feelings, our behaviour.

    Our thoughts hold energy. A single thought can spark a whirlwind of action.

    The greatest power we have is in being conscious of thoughts. Our internal will. Will we listen to the thoughts? Will we provide a counter thought? Does this thought hold merit?

    With a conscious will, we can use our thoughts like seeds to plant in the garden that is our mind. Over time with love and care, these seeds will prosper, grow and build strong foundations. On this same wavelength, we can consciously choose not to feed thoughts that drain us, that are not helpful.

    Your power and potential begins in being aware of your thoughts. This awareness has limitless potential in elevating your life. It is the start of a beautiful life long journey. Consciousness.

    On the power of our thoughts

    Reality is a projection of your thoughts or the things you habitually think about.

    ~ Stephen Richards

    You are today where your thoughts have brought you; you will be tomorrow where your thoughts take you.


    Nothing is good or bad, but thinking makes it so.


    It’s not the situation that’s causing your stress, it’s your thoughts, and you can change that right here and now. You can choose to be peaceful right here and now. Peace is a choice, and it has nothing to do with what other people do or think.


    The universe is a cobweb; minds are spiders.


    Can we control our thoughts?

    We are the masters of our mind. We control our mind.

    Yes we can be triggered. Yes there are external influences. Yes we can be swayed.

    However, no one has the power to put thoughts in our head without our permission. Our mind is the gatekeeper – do we allow this thought? Is this thought of merit? Is it true?

    One tool and resource that I hugely advocate and passionately believe in are affirmations. Affirmations can be used to influence our thoughts is our will and determination..

    They can provide a conscious focus for our power and desire to change.

    The power of our will, the power of our desire.

    Affirmations are powerful statements that we usually repeat to compel us into action or a different state of mind. 

    Equally, they are a conscious statement we make to ourselves. 

    They do indeed help us with a positive, purposeful and growth orientated mindset. 

    in her vitality

    Further information can be found here: The power of affirmations to living soul fulfilling life.

    Given the nature of affirmations – their positivity and power in repetition – they can help increase our mood and focus in our thoughts.

    For example, when I struggle with anxious thoughts, I use affirmations to reframe my thoughts for a positive mindset. I also use affirmations to be calm and accept what is happening.

    In conclusion on changing your thoughts and in turn your world

    The best you can do is think deeply on this and come to a conclusion for yourself. As for what I believe in? Yes, change your thoughts and change your world.

    Additional resources on our thoughts and the power of our mind

    The power of thoughts – Live your True Story

    The power of thoughts – Renew Your Mind

    The power of your thoughts – Wanderlust Worker

    Click here to read more

  • 22 Positive affirmations for the workplace to overcome stress

    Positive affirmations in the workplace help to feel instantly soothed, calm and centred.

    They help tap into the inner peace within you.

    Workplaces can be highly stressful and overwhelming at times. Any job can have elements which cause stress, even when you love what you do.

    Affirmations can provide a moment of reprieve in these moments when you feel anxiety and tension. They are a helpful relaxation strategy in your toolkit to overcome work stress.

    The following 22 positive affirmations for the workplace help to overcome stress. Refer to the power of affirmations to live a soul fulfilling life for a greater understanding on the ability for affirmations to improve your mindset and wellbeing.

    What is work stress?

    BetterHealth sums up work stress as:

    Some of the many causes of work-related stress include long hours, heavy workload, job insecurity and conflicts with co-workers or bosses.

    Symptoms include a drop in work performance, depression, anxiety and sleeping difficulties.


    22 Positive affirmations for the workplace to overcome stress

    ♥ I can do anything but I can’t do everything.

    ♥ Asking for help does not mean I am incompetent or weak.

    ♥ I am allowed to have a break.

    ♥ I need to be at my best, feel my best, to do my best.

    ♥ There is always work to be done. I can’t always finish it all at the end of the day.

    ♥ I can’t control other people.

    ♥ It is only work. It is only one aspect of my life.

    ♥ Challenges bring opportunities.

    ♥ I learn from my mistakes.

    ♥ Mistakes are opportunities to grow.

    ♥ Every day is a new day.

    ♥ Feedback helps me grow.

    ♥ I trust that every decision I make is the best I could at that time.

    ♥ I would not be in my job if management did not believe I could do it.

    ♥ Failure is normal. It is impossible to never make mistakes.

    ♥ This situation is not good or bad. It just is.

    ♥ It is what it is.

    ♥ I feel stressed right now but I can overcome it.

    ♥ I am letting go of stress so I can think clearly.

    ♥ My experiences have equipped me to make the best decision.

    ♥ I am capable of handling anything. I can do hard things.

    ♥ This situation will pass, it is not forever.

    In conclusion on these affirmations

    Love and light, I hope these positive affirmations for the workplace help in reducing your stress. Should your work stress feel overwhelming, it may be best to speak to friends and family in addition to reaching out to your human resources department at work, employee assistance programs and medical professionals.

    Other affirmations for stress reduction

    27 Calming affirmations and mantras for acceptance – in her vitality

    Struggling with anxious thoughts? Here are 22 powerful affirmations to reframe your thoughts for a positive mindset – in her vitality

    Additional resources for work stress

    Work-related stress – BetterHealth

    Coping with stress at work – American Psychological Association

    Learn to rest not quit – Imperfect Ambition

    Click here to read more

  • 27 Calming affirmations and mantras for acceptance

    An introduction on the calming affirmations and mantras for acceptance

    The following 27 calming affirmations and mantras for acceptance may be Instantly effective in helping you feel immediately at ease and cultivate deep inner peace to help you thrive. If you are not familiar with affirmations or need a reminder, check out the power of affirmations to live a soul fulfilling life.

    What is true acceptance?

    True acceptance is a life-changing practice which deeply influences how you feel and your inner peace.

    It alters an experience to overcome difficulty and negativity.

    To accept is a verb. Accepting is a fluid, active and dynamic concept.

    It is practice that lasts our lifetimes.

    It requires patience with ourselves.

    It requires a deep love for ourselves.

    It does not necessarily mean you agree with, like, enjoy, support or picked the outcome.

    What it does mean is choosing in that moment to make space for what is happening right then and there.

    To lighten the load you feel in your heart, in your soul, on your back, aching in your bones.

    Where does this block sit? 

    Feel into it.

    Give yourself permission to stop struggling against it.

    To stop fighting the outcome.

    True acceptance is not easy, it is difficult. 

    True acceptance is to melt resistance.

    To let go.

    To flow.

    Quotes that embody and teach acceptance

    “Life is a series of natural and spontaneous changes. Don’t resist them; that only creates sorrow. Let reality be reality. Let things flow naturally forward in whatever way they like.”


    “For after all, the best thing one can do when it is raining is let it rain.”

    Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

    “Acceptance looks like a passive state, but in reality it brings something entirely new into this world. That peace, a subtle energy vibration, is consciousness.”

    Eckhart Tolle

    “When you find peace within yourself, you become the kind of person who can live at peace with others.”

    Peace Pilgrim

    “Acceptance doesn’t mean that life gets better; it just means that my way of living life on life’s terms improves.”

    Sharon E. Rainey

    How these 27 calming affirmations and mantras help with acceptance

    They are a reminder of the inner peace and strength that already lives inside you.

    A reminder:

    + To tap into these infinite sources whenever you need.

    + Your soul and spirit and here to support you always.

    + Of how far you have come in your life already, achieved so much and you will continue to do so.

    + Of your power.

    + Of your resilience. 

    They help:

    + Tap into the inner peace that is always within you.

    + Calm down and recenter your self.

    + Melt tension at put you at ease. Pair the following calming affirmations if you are struggling with anxious thoughts.

    + Provide a counter statement to negative or unhelpful thoughts.

    27 Calming affirmations and mantras for acceptance

    ♥ I can do anything but I can’t do everything.

    ♥ It is what it is.

    ♥ I accept.

    ♥ I can do anything but I can’t do everything.

    ♥ There is nothing more I can do.

    ♥ I accept.

    ♥ I release all resistance.

    ♥ I surrender. I trust in the universe.

    ♥ I am letting go of what I cannot control.

    ♥ I trust the timing of my life.

    ♥ Everything will be ok. Everything is ok.

    ♥ What is meant to be for me, will be.

    ♥ I accept the things I cannot change.

    ♥ I accept all things as they are right now.

    ♥ I am at peace with what is.

    ♥ I have a deep peace within me which is infinite. It is always accessible whenever I need.

    ♥ I have done the best I can at this very moment in time.

    ♥ I trust myself to make the best decision at this very moment in time.

    ♥ Everything happens for a reason.

    ♥ Everything is unfolding as it should.

    ♥ I allow life to unfold naturally.

    ♥ Life unfolds as the universe has it. Everything is for my higher good.

    ♥ I am open to all outcomes no matter what they are.

    ♥ This is a sign from the universe that it wants me to learn and grow.

    ♥ The universe is guiding me right now.

    ♥ I am brave. I am strong. I have the power to accept what is happening right now.

    ♥ I know that everything happens for a reason, for my higher good even if I don’t understand it right now.

    Concluding 27 calming affirmations and mantras for acceptance

    It is my hope that these 27 calming affirmations and mantras help you find inner peace, to conquer any challenge, to melt and rid of any tension, anxiety and stress, I hope they have been influential in your acceptance of what is.

    More resources on acceptance

    The inescapable importance of acceptanceDenise Fournier Ph.D., Psychology Today

    What is ACT and Mindfulness?Russ Harris, ActMindfully

    How to accept thingsWise Mushroom

    Click here to read more

  • 46 Affirmations to radiate self love

    On self love and this guide

    This article will explore the importance of self love and the power it has to transform your life into a soul fulfilling one. It is my hope after reading this you will feel further connected and at peace with your self. The resources within this guide are 46 affirmations to radiate self love. 

    What is self love?

    Self love is how we feel about ourselves. It is linked to our self esteem. It is caring and having regard for your own well-being and happiness. It is how we experience ourselves.

    From my understand of it, self love is:

    ♥ Accepting yourself. Your worthiness. Honouring yourself. Being true to who you are.

    ♥ Authenticity. Knowing that you have flaws and that is okay, being at peace with it.

    ♥ Listening to your needs. Understanding what we want. Choosing ourself without comprising or sacrificing when we truly do not want to do so. This resource may be of help, A guide on how to use love languages. Love languages may be of use to you in understanding yourself better. 

    ♥ Taking care yourself. Your well-being. Nourishing our mind, body and soul.
    “An empty lantern provides no light. Self-care is the fuel that allows your light to shine brightly.”
    – Unknown

    An influential factor in decision making such as the actions we take, the partners we choose for a relationship, the behaviour we accept from ourselves and others.

    How we may feel about a soul mate or best friend in life – channeling that loving energy to ourselves. How we would treat them – with patience, love, respect, kindness and understanding.

    “Love yourself unconditionally, just as you love those closest to you despite their faults.”

    les brown

    ♥ Trusting yourself. Listening to your intuition and gut feelings. Knowing that you always make the best decision for yourself at that time. We know ourselves best. No one can self love for us.

    Quotes that inspire and speak to self love

    “Worthy now. Not if. Not when. We are worthy of love and belonging now. Right this minute. As is.”

    brene brown

    “Self respect, self worth and self love, all start with self. Stop looking outside of yourself for your value.”

    Rob Liano

    “It’s not selfish to love yourself, take care of yourself, and make your happiness a priority. It’s a necessity.”

    mandy hale

    “A healthy self-love means we have no compulsion to justify to ourselves or others why we take vacations, why we sleep late, why we buy new shoes, why we spoil ourselves from time to time. We feel comfortable doing things which add quality and beauty to life.”


    “It’s all about falling in love with yourself and sharing that love with someone who appreciates you, rather than looking for love to compensate for a self love deficit.”

    Eartha Kitt

    The power of self love affirmations

    + Remind yourself what inherently is. You are loved. You are loveable. There are times we need a pick me up. On that note, a gentle reminder on the power of affirmations to live a soul fulfilling life.

    + To empower you. To be fearless in the pursuit of your desires and dreams. To feel alive with fire.
    A gentle reminder that affirmations are one tool and they work powerfully when you truly believe in them and pair them with action. Read more here.

    + Help you feel deeply into your heart and soul.

    + Shift your perspective and energy when you are feeling down or in a rut.

    + Provide a counter statement to negative thoughts.

    + Identify aspects of self love that may need exploration. If you feel discomfort, it may help to see it from the perspective of curiosity. To learn more about yourself. To spark reflection.

    46 Affirmations to radiate self love

    ♥ No matter what, I am loved and I am loveable.
    ♥ I love who I was. I love who I am. I love who I am becoming.
    ♥ I am strong. I am resilient. I can do hard things.

    ♥ I am more than just my body.
    ♥ I love myself and I choose myself
    ♥ I believe in myself
    ♥ I am human. Perfectly imperfect.
    ♥ I make mistakes sometimes and that is okay. I am human. We all make mistakes. 

    ♥ I made mistakes and learn from them for a better future
    ♥ I made the best decision at that moment in time
    ♥ I know myself best and that is why I made that decision at that moment in time

    ♥ I follow my heart
    ♥ I am proud of who I am.

    ♥ I choose my happiness.
    ♥ I have so much potential.
    ♥ My opportunities are limitless.
    ♥ I am true to mysel
    ♥ I deserve love
    ♥ I am beautiful 
    ♥ Love flows through me. I am radiant. I am abundant.
    ♥ I have a beautiful, peaceful energy 
    ♥ I always do the best that I can at that moment in time
    ♥ I am powerful. I have the power to begin changing my life at any moment.

    ♥ I can always trust my intuition.
    ♥ Love, happiness and peace flow within me.
    ♥ I radiate love, joy and peace.
    ♥ I have good energy.
    ♥ I am so loveable.
    ♥ I let go of my worries and my stresses. I just be.
    ♥ I attract so much love and positivity into my life.
    ♥ I feel peace at my core.
    ♥ So much love exists inside me.
    ♥ I am unique. I am one of a kind. This makes me beautiful, special and important.
    ♥ I love and forgive myself.
    ♥ The greatest gift I can give myself is unconditional love.

    ♥ Deep within side me is an infinite source of love. I can tap into this at any time I want or need to.
    ♥ I have the ability to do things for myself.
    ♥ I am worthy of so much joy.
    ♥ I can dreams as big or as small as I would like.
    ♥ I am love. I am light.
    ♥ I constantly have new opportunities. 
    ♥ I can magnetically manifest all that my heart desires. I can make my dreams come true.
    ♥ Everything always works in my favour. The universe has my back and best interests at heart.
    ♥ I am open to love.
    ♥ I am ready for love as I am.
    ♥ I love myself more and more everyday. 

    In conclusion of this guide

    Love and light, we hope these 46 affirmations to radiate self love bring you warmth, inner peace and vitality.

    Additional resources on how to radiate self love



    Click here to read more

  • A guide on how to use love languages

    An introduction on how to use love languages

    With my deepest love and sincerity, it is my hope this guide will help you learn how to use love langauges.
    Love langauges will help you better understand your partner and as a result improve how you communicate. It is important to note they can also help you understand yourself.

    What are love languages?

    Whilst love is a universal language, there are various branches within the expansive force that is love. Love languages are a powerful resource to understand how your partner likes to receive love.
    They also assist in helping us to better understand ourselves and how to communicate to our partner what makes us feel appreciated. Their origins are from the book The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman.

    Why are love languages important?

    They help us:

    + Deepen our connection with our partner

    + Understand our partner and show love in a meaningful way

    + Communicate our desires and needs within a relationship

    + To be thoughtful, attentive and mindful of our partner

    + Strengthen the bond with our partner

    + Maintain a close and intimate relationship with our partner

    What are the love languages?

    • 1. Words of affirmation
    • 2. Quality time
    • 3. Receiving gifts
    • 4. Acts of service
    • 5. Physical touch

    A quick summary of the love languages:

    • 1. Words of affirmation: These tacos taste delicious, thank you!
    • 2. Quality time: Lets go get tacos together on Friday night.
    • 3. Receiving gifts: Here, I have some tacos for you because you mentioned how much you were craving them the other night.
    • 4. Acts of service: I made you some tacos because I can see you don’t have time to make lunch.
    • 5. Physical touch: Let me wrap my arms around you like a taco.

    Love Language: Words of affirmation

    Using our words to build our partner up. It is important to be authentic and genuinely mean what we say. The intention and emotion further support what we say.

    Recognising the words of affirmation love language:

    + They smile ear to ear when praised or told compliments.

    + Love public acknowledgement.

    + Often show appreciation

    + Enjoy sentimental posts and acknowledgement on social media

    It is important to note if your partner has the love language of words of affirmation:

    + Acknowledge and validate how our partner feels.

    + Be their biggest supporter and encourage them to be their best selves in a loving and respectful manner.

    + Be mindful of what we say and how it is said (tone, use of words, timing, attitude etc.)

    Examples of what to say to show love to your partner who has the love language of affirmation of words:

    + I really appreciate having you in my life.

    + I am so lucky to have you as my partner.

    + Wow you look incredible.

    + I believe in you. You’ve accomplished so much in your life and you will continue to do so!

    + I can completely understand why you would feel that way.

    + I hear you.

    Examples of actions to show love to your partner who has the love language of affirmation of words:

    + Talk to them directly face to face.

    + Compliment them.

    + Write them a love note.

    + Surprise them with a heart felt text message.

    + Speak highly of them to family, friends, colleagues etc.

    + Use a sincere and loving tone at all times.

    + Be vocal in the bedroom.

    Avoid these actions if your partner has the words of affirmations love language:

    – Criticising your partner with strong, aggressive language e.g. expletives.

    – Failing to recognise what they do for you.

    – Insulting your partner such as name calling.

    After conflict with your partner who has the words of affirmations love language?

    + A sincere and heart felt apology face to face acknowledging and taking responsibility for your actions.

    + Reminding them why you love them so much through your words such as a handwritten letter.

    + Writing a poem on why you appreciate them.

    Love Language: Quality time

    Time is not only invaluable, it is irreplaceable. It is one of the most precious gifts we can give anyone. The love language of quality time means to give your partner your full, undivided attention, to prioritise them and to share rich experiences together.

    Recognising the love language of quality time:

    + They use a diary, planner or calendar to organise their schedule and week.

    + They aren’t easily distracted.

    + They make time for loved ones such as travelling far distances to visit, rearrange their schedule, plan in advance etc.

    + Feel enriched and nourished by experiences.

    Actions your partner will love if they have the love language of quality time:

    + Plan a day trip or weekend away

    + Go for a holiday together

    + Cook dinner together

    + Go for a walk together

    + Take a moment to ask how their day was to spark a meaningful conversation

    + Give them your full presence by putting your phone away, turning off the TV etc.

    Avoid these actions if your partner enjoys quality time:

    – Distractions such as constantly using your phone

    – Failing to prioritise and make time for them

    – Going a long time without seeing them

    – Not making eye contact

    – Failing to actively listen

    – Ignoring your partner, stonewalling, the silent treatment.

    After conflict with your partner who values quality time?

    + Plan a date night

    + Engage in quality conversation

    + Be deliberate with your time

    Love Language: Receiving gifts

    Expressing your love with a thought out item which symbolises love and appreciation. It is not to be confused with materialism, the price of the item is not the value of the gift. It is about the sentiment of the gift. A token of affection. It is about putting yourself in their shoes to show them how attentive you are. It truly is the thought that counts.

    Recognising the love language of receiving gifts:

    + They give sentimental gifts e.g. custom items, handmade items, antique items.

    + Spoil people with gifts.

    + Bring back souvenirs from holidays.

    + Enjoy shopping.

    + Always have wrapping paper, ribbon, gift bags, gift tags and cards on hand.

    How to make your partner feel loved if they value receiving gifts:

    + Take notice of what makes them smile and sparks joy. What do they mention in passing?

    + Personalising gifts

    + Surprise gifts such as flowers

    + A homemade card or scrapbook

    + An item that can be worn everyday as a daily reminder of love such as jewellery

    – Forgetting a special occasions such as your anniversary, birthdays and Valentine’s Day

    – Awkward timings of gifts e.g. a grand gesture early on in the relationship

    After conflict with someone who values gift receiving?

    + A token of love. Even better it could be something sentimental and dear to them.

    Acts of service

    Actions speak louder than words. Help alleviate stress and spark joy in their lives, by sharing the responsibilities of life with your partner.

    Your partner has the love language of acts of service if they have:

    + They have discussed or set up a plan to share chores.

    + They always thank you after you have helped around the house and tell you how much they appreciate it.

    + The undertake household tasks without you asking.

    + Spend lots of time undertaking tasks.

    + Speak about how much they have to do.

    How to make your partner feel loved if they have the love language of acts of service:

    + Proactively notice tasks that need to be done.

    + Household chores such as taking out the rubbish, tidying any mess, vacuuming and mopping the floors, cleaning the bathroom, ironing, folding the laundry etc.

    + Making dinner when they’re home late because of work.

    + Making a coffee in the morning when they are rushing to work.

    Avoid these actions if their love language is acts of service:

    – Failing to follow through with what you promise to do.

    – Being ambivalent.

    – Not being there for your partner to support.

    – Being lazy.

    – Creating more work for your partner e.g. spilling something and not cleaning it up, leaving dishes at the sink etc.

    After conflict with someone who has the love language of acts of service?

    – Taking action to change behaviours based on their feedback.

    Physical touch

    How to recognise if your partner has the love language of physical touch:

    + They enjoy PDA; public displays of affection such as holding hands and kissing in public.

    + Enjoy massages.

    + Smile ear to ear when you kiss or hug them.

    + Give firm, lingering hugs.

    + Always greet you with a kiss.

    + Enjoy cuddling and spooning.

    + Frequently lovingly touch you e.g. light touches on your leg, running their hands on your back or through your hair

    How to make your partner feel loved if their love language is physical touch:

    + Holding hands.

    + Kissing.

    + Touching.

    + Hugging.

    + Massages.

    + Spooning.

    + Sexual Intercourse.

    + Initiating touch.

    + Dancing together.

    Avoid these actions if your partner has the love language of physical touch:

    – Long moments of time without intimacy.

    – Withholding affection.

    – Physical neglect or abuse.

    After conflict with your partner who has the love language of physical touch?

    – Cuddling. Holding each other without speaking.

    – Make up sex.

    In conclusion about love languages:

    Love languages help us identify how to best love our partner. They also help us understand our own love language so that we are able to communicate to our partners on how to best love us. 

    Further resources:

    By extension, the importance of loving yourself, 46 affirmations to radiate self love and the power of being in a mindset of vitality.

    A quiz to understand what love language you are 5 Love Languages

    Frequently asked questions such as if your love language changes as you get older?

    Do love languages actually matter? Psychologists weigh in – Mic

    Click here to read more

  • Struggling with anxious thoughts? Here are 22 powerful affirmations to reframe your thoughts for a positive mindset

    Firstly, I want to reaffirm something deeply in your mind. It is normal to struggle with anxious thoughts from time to time. This article will help you reframe your thoughts for a positive mindset when you are struggling with these anxious thoughts

    What is anxiety?

    Beyond Blue defines anxiety as the below:

    “Anxiety is more than just feeling stressed or worried. While stress and anxious feelings are a common response to a situation where we feel under pressure, they usually pass once the stressful situation has passed, or ‘stressor’ is removed.

    Everyone feels anxious from time to time. When anxious feelings don’t go away, happen without any particular reason or make it hard to cope with daily life it may be the sign of an anxiety condition.”

    Disclaimer on anxiety, please note

    I use the below affirmations when I have an anxious moment to calm and recenter myself. It is important to note that affirmations are one tool amongst many that may be used to help with anxiety. The ones below are a general resource and are are not a substitute for professional, psychological, psychiatric or medical advice. Always seek the advice of your doctor and other qualified mental health providers with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition such as anxiety.

    How these powerful affirmations may help when struggling with anxious thoughts

    • Reframe your mindset with an alternative perspective
    • Calm and recentre yourself
    • Inspire an uplift in mindset geared toward positivity, a reminder on what affirmations are here and how they help you live a soul fulfilling life
    • Provide a counter narrative to anxiety provoking thought
    • Pause and diffuse a moment of stress and tension

    22 Powerful affirmations to reframe your mindset when you are struggling with anxious thought

    ♥ I attract positive energy.

    ♥ I am strong. I am resilient. I can do hard things.

    ♥ I am in the process of making positive changes.

    ♥ I am brave.

    ♥ I am overwhelmed right now but this shall pass.

    ♥ I have the power to change.

    ♥ Everything is going to be okay.

    ♥ I have overcome many challenges and obstacles before in my life. This will be no different.

    ♥ I can’t control everything but I can try change my thoughts, attitude and perspective.

    ♥ I have accomplished so much up to this point in my life and I will continue to succeed.

    ♥ I am always learning. I will continue to grow and evolve.

    ♥ I trust myself to make the best decision at this moment in time.

    ♥ I feel anxious and that is okay. We all feel anxious at times.

    ♥ I feel confident in my ability to solve problems.

    ♥ I trust in the universe that I will thrive.

    ♥ I am open to change

    ♥ I let go of the need to be perfect and I know I will do my best.

    ♥ I know that I am doing my best given what is happening right now.

    ♥ I am doing the best I can.

    ♥ Mistakes happen and that is okay. I will learn from my mistakes for a better future.

    ♥ Change helps me realise my potential.

    ♥ My mistakes help me grow and improve for the future.

    In conclusion on struggling thoughts due to anxiety and using affirmations

    These 22 affirmations may help you reframe your thoughts for a positive mindset as they have the ability to calm you down, allow a pause to diffuse tension, provide an alternative counter narrative and inspire an uplift in mentality.

    It is so important if you are struggling with these thoughts on a regular basis and if they impact your daily life, please seek the help of a medical professional who will be able to help you.

    Additional resources for when you are struggling with anxious thoughts 

    Click here to read more

  • The Power of Affirmations to Live a Soul Fulfilling Life

    Affirmations are a powerful conscious statement

    What is an affirmation?

    Affirmations are powerful statements that we usually repeat to compel us into action or a different state of mind.

    Equally, they are a conscious statement we make to ourselves. 

    They do indeed help us with a positive, purposeful and growth orientated mindset. 

    As a result, affirmations have the power to help us live soul fulfilling lives.

    However, alone – rarely do they rarely work.

    They are powerful when we truly believe in them and take inspired action.

    It is important to note whilst they are an empowering tool, they may not work for everyone.

    See what works best for you as you know yourself best.

    Quotes I believe that support the power of thought and in turn affirmations:

    “Whether you think you can or you think you can’t, you’re right.”


    “I rejoice in the knowledge that I have the power of my own mind to use in any way I choose”


    “She knew the power of her mind and so programmed it for success.”


    “Reality is a projection of your thoughts or the things you habitually think about.”


    “As you think, so shall you become.”


    The Power of Affirmations

    • Magnetically manifest your desires
    • To diffuse stress and calm your mind for example when you struggle with anxious thoughts
    • To provide an alternative, counter thought to negative thoughts
    • Influence your mind, attitude and perspective and in turn your life to be more soul fulfilling
    • Instil belief within yourself
    • Keep you focused on a goal or dream
    • Encourage yourself to take action in pursuing a soul fulfilling life
    • Love yourself more. See here for 46 affirmations to radiate self love

    How to use Affirmations to Live a Soul Fulfilling Life

    • Truly believe in the affirmation. Anchor the affirmation within your body. Embody the affirmation. Feel the affirmation. If you are finding it hard to believe in the affirmation, it may help to be curious and to identify as to why you feel this way. A professional psychologist would greatly benefit in this situation.
    • Repeat them. I believe repetition enables you to permeate the affirmation from your conscious mind to your unconscious mind. Repeat them out loud to yourself. Repeat them in your mind.
    • Write them out repeatedly. “As a single footstep will not make a path on the earth, so a single thought will not make a pathway in the mind. To make a deep physical path, we walk again and again. To make a deep mental path, we must think over and over the kind of thoughts we wish to dominate our lives.” – Winfred Peterson
    •  Say them out loud and record yourself and then play them back to yourself.
    • Write them on post it notes and place them anywhere to remind yourself.
    • Reflect upon affirmations.
    • Meditate upon them.

    Examples of affirmations to live a soul fulfilling life

    ♥ I am strong. I am resilient. I can do hard things.

    ♥ I am so loveable. I am worthy of love. I am love.

    ♥ I can make my dreams come true.

    ♥ Everything happens for a reason. The universe has my back.

    ♥ I always make the best decisions for that moment in time.

    ♥ I make myself so proud.

    ♥ I am on the right path.

    ♥ Inner peace radiations within me.

    ♥ Amazing things can and are happening in my life.

    ♥ I am always safe. The universe protects me.

    Concluding on the power of affirmations

    In conclusion, it should be clear from this article the power of affirmations in living a soul fulfilling life.

    Additional helpful resources on the power of affirmations in living a soul fulfilling life:

    Click here to read more