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Episode Summary of The Grow Through It Podcast with Phi Dang, 09: How to Create and Have Success in 2021
Learn about the #1 Mistake people make when it comes to success in addition to practical tips and strategies on how to create and have success. I also do a Q&A on all things success from how to stay motivated, being successful during times of uncertainty and a lack of resources such as money when it comes to having success.
What you'll learn from this episode
- The #1 Mistake People Make When it Comes to Creating Change and Success
- Why Getting Started is Always the Hardest
- Why There is No Such Thing As Success Without Failure
- How to Achieve Your Goals and Success
- Habit Stacking
- How to Prioritise Your Goals and Success
- How to Stay Motivated To Hit Your Goals
- How to Achieve Your Goals and Be Successful during Times of Uncertainty
- How to Achieve Your Goals and Be Successful without Resources such as Money
Key Quotes from this Episode
Don’t let others or society define it for you, figure out what success is for you.
The outer world is a reflection of your inner world.
You can create the reality and results you want. But guess what? You aren’t entitled to that without doing the work.
Featured Resources on the episode
- Learn more about 1:1 Coaching with Phi here.
- Follow Phi on Instagram here.
- For more on zero to one and the difficulty of starting anything new, listen to Episode 5 -River of Misery
- Research on how sharing goals makes it more likely to be successful: When goals are known: The effects of audience relative status on goal commitment and performance.
- Habit Stacking research: Habits—A Repeat Performance by David T. Neal, Wendy Wood, and Jeffrey M. Quinn
The Grow Through It Podcast with Phi Dang, 09: How to Create and Have Success in 2021 - Show Transcript
You are listening to episode 9 of the Grow Through It Podcast with Phi Dang: How to Create and Have Success in 2021.
[Introduction to the Grow Through It Podcast With Phi Dang plays – Background Music: upbeat, confident, rising beat]:
Don’t just go through life, grow through it. Don’t just go through life, grow through it.
Hi and Welcome to the Grow Through It Podcast with Phi Dang.
My name is Phi and I am a Clarity and Confidence Life Coach known as the “The Positivity Queen.”
My passion is to help you go from stuck and self critical to courageous and empowered so you can conquer anything.
Join me, every Tuesday, as I discuss all things mindset, self love, energy and purpose.
This podcast won’t just inspire and motivate you, it will also provide practical tips and strategies you can implement in your daily life.
Ready to grow? Let’s grow!
[Grow Through It Podcast With Phi Dang End of Intro]
[Episode 09 – How to Create and Have Success in 2021 Begins]
Hello beautiful souls.
Happy 2021!
This is going to be your best year yet, I just know it.
If anyone hasn’t told you already, I have full faith in you.
I have full faith because you are here, listening to the first episode for 2021 of the Grow Through It Podcast with Phi Dang.
By doing this, you are intentionally setting time aside for you.
To work on yourself, to create success for yourself – so congratulations, I’m proud of you!
A mindset open to learning and prioritising their self development and growth is always going to be successful.
People like you, are the people I love to work with in my 1:1 coaching program.
If you are the type of person who loves personal development through books, courses and podcasts and you are ready for the next step, to supercharge and accelerate your growth, let’s chat – I have limited 1:1 coaching spots left for this first quarter of this year as I am so happy to have 3 of you beautiful souls join me last week!
Now as you gathered from the title, this podcast is all about creating and having a successful 2021.
In this modern day and age, we know that success looks different to everyone, it’s a matter of defining your success. For some it will be money, for others it will be a running a huge marathon.
Don’t let others or society define it for you, figure out what success is for you.
When we talk success, in this episode its in the framework of achieving your goals because I know goals are at the top of many people’s minds when it come to a new year.
Now I also know a lot of other podcasts and all the freebies, motivational speakers and influencers talk about how to create successful goals, for me that’s something that I do with my 1:1 coaching clients as it’s very personal. This podcast will focus more on the journey of achieving goals and your success.
So let’s begin.
The #1 Mistake People Make When it Comes to Creating Change and Success
I want to lay down for you a foundational base for creating success. To do that I want to first of all address the #1 mistake people make when it comes to creating change based on my experience as a life coach with clients from all over the world.
People try to change their reality by changing the outside world.
This is a thought error.
The outside world is just circumstances.
Circumstances are neutral.
The factor that will truly shift and create change for you is your thoughts.
Your thoughts cause your feelings.
Your feelings cause your actions.
Your actions cause your results.
So to truly change anything it begins in your thoughts because your thoughts are in your control.
If you don’t agree with my statement, you have work to do.
If you don’t understand why, let’s chat because this is the realm I work within as a life coach.
Most people go around this world on auto-pilot dangerously in their mind. They believe whatever goes on in their brain and they don’t intentionally choose their thoughts!
When you don’t intentionally choose your thoughts, you choose to believe the negativity that goes in on your mind that’s formed over years of subconscious programming.
Then you go around life not knowing why you feel bad on a regular basis and you don’t know what to do with those thoughts. The lines become blurry. You don’t know how to change your thought process or how to process your emotions.
It’s not a surprise and it’s not your fault. We don’t learn about this at school, at university or even in our jobs.
We only truly learn about this when we work on ourselves through personal development, when we invest in a coach.
Your thoughts are your inner work.
The outer world is a reflection of your inner world.
For example if you have a chaotic mind, you’ll find more often than not a messy, disorganised home.
If you’re finding it hard to find love, it’s because you don’t truly love yourself.
If you’re finding it hard to make money, it’s because you have a scarcity mindset.
Trying to change your reality by changing the outside world, is like trying to change white wine to red wine by adding food colouring.
If you want actual change, you have to go to the source.
If you want the wine to actually change, you have to use a different variety of grapes.
If you want your reality to change, you have to fo the source: you, your thoughts.
Zero to One
In the journey for change and success, the first step is always the hardest.
First of all, when you want to do something new, you’re starting at zero.
You have no track record or experience.
You have no momentum.
There’s nothing.
More than anything, it takes determination, energy and effort to go from zero to one than it does to get to get from any other steps after that.
After that, every step is easier than the first.
You can achieve the goals you set.
You can create the reality and results you want.
But guess what? You aren’t entitled to that without doing the work.
You have the do the work.
You have to earn your results.
Now zero to one is the hardest but don’t let that stop you.
You can do hard things.
You were made for hard things.
There is no such thing as success without failure
We cannot discuss success without failure.
Guess what, success and failure go hand in hand.
You can’t choose whether you will succeed or fail because failure is always going to be a part of success. You can only choose what kind of failure you are going to have.
The only real failure in my eyes is to not try at all or to use it as an excuse to quit.
Further to this, allow yourself to grow. Give yourself permission to grow.
When you plant seeds in the garden, you don’t check every day to see if they have instantly bloomed.
You simply water them everyday, clear the weeds and know that in time they will grow.
Breathe easy beautiful soul, it will happen – let things unfold as they are meant to.
How do you achieve your goals?
If anyone tells you there’s a secret to making it happen, there isn’t.
There’s no magic formula or button, it truly is just doing the work.
It is overwhelming to go from 0 to 100 but it’s much easier to go from 0 to 1 to 2 to 3.
The key to success is consistency and knowing that every little bit counts even just 1%.
The pain you feel today, becomes the strength of your tomorrow
What can you do everyday to get you one step closer to your goal?
Think of success like a ladder.
To get to the top of the ladder sure you could leap from 0 to 4 rungs or even jump from rung 3 to rung 7 but when you do that, not only is it harder and requires more energy, you may fall in the process of doing so.
Consistency on the ladder is going up steadily one rung at a time..
Accountability
Further to this, let us sprinkle accountability into the mix.
How different is it when you write down a goal in your journal and tell no one vs have a life coach checking in with you weekly asking if you’ve done what you needed to do that week to make your goal happen and post about your goal openly on social media?
Very different right?
Studies have shown that when you share your goals with others, you are twice as likely to achieve them than if you keep the goals to yourself.
When you don’t share your goals in some way, you aren’t truly committed to them. It’s very easy to give up because it’s like they never really existed.
Another reason why accountability works is well we are human and we want to save face.
Your reputation is on the line to loved ones, to people you know, to strangers on the internet. You want to fulfil the expectations that others have of you.
A life coach is worth the investment as there isn’t the strain of telling a loved one or friend. A coach does not judge, scold or blame, your coach is there to support you every step of the way, help you develop strategies to overcome obstacles and help you realise what works for you and what does not.
So far everything I’ve discussed cements the fact that success is not an accident.
Success is intentional.
Habits play deeply into success as they account for about 40 percent of our behaviours on any given day.
Let’s pause for a moment to consider this.
Almost half of the things you do on any day isn’ a result of conscious decisions but behaviours that you have repeated so many times they have become more or less automatic.
You no longer think about them, there’s no mind drama, you just do them.
It has been widely said that it takes 21 days to make a habit, so I’m not going to go into this.
Rather I want to introduce the concept of habit stacking with you
Habit Stacking
Habit stacking uses the habits you already have and using the power of connection to create new habits.
It makes sense right, you’ve already done something so much it’s almost auto pilot – if you use that as a foundational base to make a new habit, it’s more likely to stick.
Habit stacking goes like this
After or Before [CURRENT HABIT], I will [NEW HABIT].
Simple examples could be:
Before I eat breakfast, I will write down 3 things I am grateful for.
After I brush my teeth, I will take a minute to meditate.
Before I check my phone in the morning, I will stretch for 5 minutes.
So when I discussed the topic of goal setting and success on my Instagram you beautiful souls had a variety questions that I would like to answer. A Q&A a on goal setting and success.
How do you prioritise your goals and success?
When it comes to prioritising, think of it like this.
Everyone in the world has 24 hours including Beyonce, Oprah, Elon Musk. What are you doing with every hour you get?
Is what you are doing helping you get closer to your goal?
Another useful tool is to use a decision matrix, how important is the task and how urgent is the task?
How do you stay motivated towards your goals and success?
Always know your purpose.
A great exercise for this is something I learnt from The Life Coach school. It’s called the 3-2-1 method.
Everyday write down your goal followed by 3 reasons why it is important to you, 2 reasons why you are equiped to make it happen and 1 thing you’ll do today to move closer to making it happen.
If you’re struggling to understand the purpose of your goal, use the 5 whys technique.
Ask yourself why, 5 times until you distill it down.
For example:
I want to get fit
1st why? To be skinnier
2nd why? So I can fit into my clothes
3rd why? So I can wear the new clothes I bought
4th why? These new clothes make me feel attractive and confident
5th why? They show off my figure. I want to feel attractive and confident to call in a relationship into my life. To feel so much love not only for my partner but for me too.
Realise this, when you chase a goal you’re chasing the feeling you get by achieving the goal. Most of the time it’s about feeling good.
The great thing about feelings is you can also conjure up feelings by recalling memories right?
If you want to feel happy, think about times where you have felt so much joy, you were laughing.
If you want to feel sad, think about times where you have experienced heart ache and pain.
If you want to feel confident, think about times where you felt at your best.
Let’s tie this into achieving our goals and the realm of success.
Let’s time leap and think about the you who achieves your goals this year.
What does the future you who achieved your goal think?
How does the future you who achieved your goal feel?
What does the future you do?
Taste it for a moment.
Your subconscious can’t help but latch on and work in the background to find a way to make it happen.
Not only that, how do you embody future you right now?
What about achieving your goals and having success during times of uncertainty?
Life is always going to be changing, change is the only constant.
No matter what you need to have confidence in yourself.
When you are confident in yourself, it doesn’t matter what is happening in the external world.
The outside world doesn’t define who you are and what you can do, you do.
Your job doesn’t define you, how much money you make, your relationship, how much you do, you do.
You control your thoughts, you control your belief, you control your decisions.
You know you can do hard things.
You know you will find a way to make it happen.
You know that you will figure it out.
Self confidence is having belief in yourself.
It’s taking the leap through the faith.
Is reality controlling you or are you making the most of the current reality?
Think about this analogy, that you are at a casino playing blackjack.
Whatever cards you get, your goal is to win.
You can’t control the cards you are being dealt, but what you do with those cards you control that. You also control your appearance, do you look confident with your hand or are you truly confident with your hand. Do you look defeated by your cards but secretly you know you have been dealt amazing cards?
That doesn’t mean you’ll always win with every hand but thats okay right? Just because you lose one round doesn’t make you a terrible player. Just because you’ve been losing consistently doesn’t mean you’ll always lose. The tides turn. After all you can win big in just one round and leave.
What if I don't have enough resources to make my goals happen and be successful?
This one really ties into a scarcity vs abundance mindset.
Scarcity says why is this happening to me. Abundance says what is here for me.
Focus on what you do have, when you notice the good things in your life, you can’t help but feel more abundant.
An abundant mindset looks for opportunities and understands the more you give, the more you will get.
For example, if it’s money – the most incredible thing of our time is the internet. There are SO many free resources out there. In exchange for money, you may exchange time because you need to filter out all the information to find out work best for you, you need to try and learn along the way.
Instead of I can’t afford that, think how can I afford that.
Are you conscious of where your current resources are going? Your time, your effort, your energy?
Most of the time we think we are but we can’t account for minute to minute of our time or dollar to dollar.
This truly is a hard one but I truly understand.
In 2020 I spent $10,000 on my self development during a global pandemic. What I realised though is I had more money than I thought. The money that I used to use on frivolous things like new clothes, Ubers, dining out and takeaway was now funding my development as a life coach through taking courses and having my own coaches.
The Grow Through It Podcast with Phi Dang, 09: How to Create and Have Success in 2021 - Close
This episode has been like a mini intensive on how to set yourself up for success in 2021.
I wanted to close this episode with some quotes and food for thought.
“There is no elevator to success, you have to take the stairs.”
“The road to success and the road to failure are almost exactly the same.”
“Successful people do what unsuccessful people are not willing to do. Don’t wish it were easier; wish you were better.”
“If you are not willing to risk the usual, you will have to settle for the ordinary.”
“I never dreamed about success, I worked for it.”
Thank you so much for listening to this episode on creating success in 2021. I am so excited for all the things to come this year. Watch this space! If you have any episode suggestions, please get in touch as I’m always looking for new ideas to explore.
Not only that, as I mentioned earlier, I have limited 1:1 coaching spots left so if you are interested and want me by your side in 2021, let’s chat, I would love to help you.
I hope you all have an absolutely incredible 2021 full of joy and success.
Love and positivity, chat to you next Tuesday.
[Episode 09 – How to Create and Have Success in 2021 Ends]
Are you wanting to find out more about 1:1 Coaching or working with me? Maybe perhaps you want to know more about me. I’d love to connect with you. You can visit my website phidang.com or connect with me on Instagram @thephidang. Speak to you soon.
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